


Howling for you

by LenneWithMilkAndHoney, Rosesnfeathers



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, F/M, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Mention of past sexual and physical abused, Steve is the softest Alpha ever, They are so in love, This is not ABO, True Love, Werewolf Bucky Barnes, Werewolf Mates, Werewolf Steve Rogers, Wolf Pack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:01:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 26,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25079548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LenneWithMilkAndHoney/pseuds/LenneWithMilkAndHoney, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosesnfeathers/pseuds/Rosesnfeathers
Summary: “Steve, what the fuck?” Natasha asks him, eyeing the wounded wolf at his feet, “Who is this?”“I don’t know,” Steve says and his pack might feel the distress in his voice because suddenly they are all surrounding him, touching his arms, his shoulders. Wanda and Nat taking his bloody hands and squeezing them, trying to reassure him.“I heard him call, and I had to get to him. I had to save him. He’s dying, we have to take care of him.”
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov/Sam Wilson
Comments: 121
Kudos: 447





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea in mind since my very first days in the MCU/SteveBucky fandom and I finally sat down to put it into words. As it was tagged THIS IS NOT A/B/O. Bucky is not an Omega, per se, but he is part of Steve's pack. He is Steve's mate. They are bonded strongly together, as soulmates are. I got greatly inspired by the wonderful books from The Green Creek serie, by TJ Klune. Forever grateful for Lenne who jumped into this project with me and did the wonderful art pieces you will find into this story  
> \- Rosesnfeathers
> 
> Hi! Thank you for giving our collab a chance. I couldn't resist the temptation after reading some snipsnops... I had to ask my wonderful author if she would like some art for this. I hope you all enjoy the story and my little experiments for it!! This has been an incredible adventure!!  
> \- Lenne

“In the wrong light, anyone can look like a darkness”

-Richard Siken

Steve wakes up with a start. 

He wakes up to the sound of a pained whimper resonating into the darkness of his room. But he is alone in there. He is drenched in sweat and his heart is beating hard and fast like his blood is responding to that sound. Like it’s reaching for the beast aching in the distance.

He listens, closely, to every single one of his pack members living and sleeping under his roof. It's none of them. Nobody, nothing is whimpering in the house. They are all sleeping peacefully, like they didn’t hear the call that woke Steve up.

And then the whimper comes again. It’s more than pain, Steve thinks. It’s death. The beast calling for him is hurt in a way that could be fatal if Steve doesn’t save it. It’s the sound of a heart, _a life_ , shattered to pieces. 

It comes from the woods stretching all around Steve’s house and he jumps out of bed as fast as he can. He changes into his wolf before he even gets to the bottom of the staircase and out of the house. 

He leaves scattered pieces of fabric behind him, his wolf stretching in a loud popping noise. His claws are out, digging in the cold ground and his bright blond fur is shining under the moonlight. His eyes, alpha red, are glowing as he searches for the wounded beast in the woods. 

He runs, following the sounds of those whimpers, following that unfamiliar scent mixed with blood and sweat and fear. 

_And death_.

Steve feels the heart of the beast beating slower and slower and he doesn’t know why it's just breaking his own damn heart, the thought that he might be too late. The thought that a wolf from a complete stranger’s pack makes his blood sing this way. It's unfamiliar and yet, it's tugging at him like nothing else before.

He runs and runs and runs. He knows he's going to run until he finds that wolf who's calling for him.

It’s the scent alone that helps Steve, the scent of blood, and pain and he hears it almost, the wolf pleading. _Please help me_ , _please save me_. 

It’s the scent that betrays the beast because it’s completely invisible in the dark woods. Fur is black like the sky above them, not a single spot of color on it. 

It is night and darkness, where Steve is golden like a bright summer day.

The wolf is unconscious. Its breathing is labored and as he gets closer, Steve sees that its black fur is matted with blood. Its left paw is broken and big spots of fur are missing on it. One of his eyes is half closed and bleeding as well. _He's male_ , Steve thinks, recognizing it by smell alone.

The wolf is too weak to heal himself. Too broken. The bond with his pack might have been severed violently for him not to be able to heal as quickly as they usually do.

Steve can’t carry that huge beast in his wolf form, so he has no choice but to change and carry him on his back. He turns back, and even in his human body, there’s something about the beast lying in front of him, that is calling to him. It’s so loud, so bright. Who is this wolf? Why is he in his woods? Why was he abandoned by his own pack like this?

Steve has heard of wars between packs before, he’s heard of severed bonds. But he’s never seen a wolf hurt and broken like the one before him. It was done against his will, he was forced away from his pack. It’s one of the worst things that can happen to a wolf, some never recover from it.

Once on his feet, Steve grabs the wolf and throws him on his shoulders. He starts running back towards the house without struggles. One of the greatest advantages of werewolves superior strength.

As he is running back he can hear his pack waking up, probably alerted by Steve’s own panic. They felt it, that their alpha was distressed and they woke up. When he reaches the house they are all on the front porch, Sam, Nat, Clint and Wanda. They are all in their pajamas looking sleepy and Steve feels sorry for waking them all up.

He can feel how worried they are, how scared. He lowers the beast at the bottom of the stairs and his heart squeezes at the pained whimper it lets out.

“Steve, what the fuck?” Natasha asks him, eyeing the wounded wolf as his feet, “Who is this?”

“I don’t know,” Steve says and his pack might feel the distress in his voice because suddenly they are all surrounding him, touching his arms, his shoulders. Wanda and Nat taking his bloody hands and squeezing them, trying to reassure him. 

“I heard him call, and I had to get to him. I had to save him. He’s dying, we have to take care of him.”

“We could put him in the barn,” Clint suggests, “we don’t know how he is going to react once he wakes up, and I think it’s better to tie him up while we tend to his wounds.”

They spend the rest of the night taking care of the wolf. They stop the bleeding and clean his wounds as best as they can. His heart finally starts beating to a more normal pace just as the sun starts rising in the sky. They leave him some food, some warm clothes. Sam and Clint and Steve all gather some of theirs, not knowing how the man under the beast would be shaped.

They all go back to the house to grab a few more hours of sleep, but Steve can’t find it in himself to walk away from the wolf just yet. He stays there and just watches the beast sleep, “You coming Steve?” Sam asks him, his voice always so soft and careful. 

“I’d like to be there when he wakes up, if it’s okay?”

Sam shakes his head with a smile. Steve knows that he is not like other alphas, he is not about giving orders, about imposing his opinions. Well, he is stubborn as hell, but his pack? Well, they are also his team. He respects and loves them as a family. 

“Of course it’s okay, Steve.”

Sam walks back to the house. The sky is painted in shades of oranges and pink as the sun rises and it looks like the tall trees surrounding the house are on fire. He feels deep down in his core, that his pack has calmed down, that they are slowly going back to sleep one after another. He turns around and looks at the black wolf sleeping form and wishes for him to wake up. To be okay, to survive. Because he wants to know why he feels such a deep connection to it. Why it feels strangely and scarily like the way Nat and Sam talks about their bond. About being each other’s mates. 

And a part of Steve is completely terrified by the way that its song sings to him in a way he can’t ignore.

-*-

When Steve wakes up a few hours later, the sun is high up in the sky and its rays are making their way into the barn, making his shirt stick to the sweaty skin of his back. His neck hurts and his legs and arms do too. They do every morning after a particularly rough full moon so it’s not really a surprise with how fast he ran last night. As he stretches his limbs, he remembers the urgency he felt, to find the beast calling for him. He remembers how it was a question of life or death just to reach him, to find him. 

Steve hears a huffing noise to his left and he turns around to see that the wolf is awake. He still looks weak and afraid. He looks like he doesn’t understand where he is, and Steve feels all kinds of conflicted emotions coming from him in waves. The wolf has retreated in a corner of the barn and his bright grey eyes are fixed on Steve. At least, he isn’t growling and showing his teeth, but the beast is alert. He isn’t trusting Steve just yet, and that is completely understandable. 

“Hey. I’m Steve,” he says as he sits up, rubbing his fingers on his tired eyes. He feels exhausted and sore but, his own discomfort isn’t the most important now, no. Steve wants to make the wolf feels safe. He wants to reassure him. He wants to stop feeling that intense fear inside of the wolf’s heart. Steve doesn’t try to approach him, but he takes his best alpha voice and tries to explain what happened to him. He knows that if some wolves spend too much time in their wolf form, it gets harder for them to understand humans properly. Steve really hopes this wolf understands when he relates the events of the previous night.

The wolf whines, after Steve’s story, then turns his back to him and hides his face in his front paws. He doesn’t escape, though. Maybe he’s still too tired or weak to do anything more than sleep, but Steve is glad that he’s at least feeling safe enough in the barn to sleep a little bit more. Steve feels the wolf’s shame, his sadness too. But underneath it all, small and almost hidden far enough for Steve not to notice, he is grateful. And it makes Steve smile.

“Are you hungry?” he asks, standing up and grimacing when his back makes a loud popping noise. He’s getting too old for running in the woods at night to save lone wolves rejected by their pack.

The beast pants again, and gives one single waggle of his tail so Steve takes it as a yes. A wolf’s hunger is stronger than fear, it seems. 

He gets in the house and takes a well deserved shower and quickly eats his breakfast with the others. He gives them some updates, that the wolf is awake and well, but still in his animal form, so probably he’s still too scared or still too weak to change. 

He then makes his way to the basement and takes a big piece of deer meat from the fridge. He gets a few fresh vegetables and fruits as well, depending on what the wolf feels like eating. He personally loves all kinds of small berries when he is in his wolf form and often stops in the bushes to munch on a few raspberries during their nights out. 

It’s with his hands full that he makes his way back to the barn and sees that the wolf is sleeping again. His ears point when Steve walks in and he opens one of his silver eyes to look at him. He growls a bit when Steve tries to get too close, so he leaves the food at a safe distance between the two of them. 

The wolf sniffs at the food but doesn’t make any movement to get at it. Steve shrugs and decides to leave him be. If he’s hungry enough, he will eat. Steve goes to the well and fills a big bowl with water. Natasha meets him there, handing him a book to read. She knows he’s going to spend the day close to the wolf, and she always thinks of everything, so she brought him stuff to entertain himself. 

She walks to the little pond next, where Sam is sitting, bathing in the bright sun. She sits next to him and he instantly wraps one of his strong arms around her waist, pulling her close. Steve smiles and shakes his head at the way they can’t stay away from each other too long.

When he reenters the barn, the food is gone, and the wolf has pieces and bits of fruits all over his muzzle. It makes Steve chuckle and at the sound, the wolf turns to face him, ears up and he wags his tail once like the sound pleased him. Then he looks away and woofs lowly like he is embarrassed about it.

“Someone was starving,” Steve says with a small smile, trying to keep the atmosphere easy and light between them. He doesn’t know how to show the wolf that he can trust him, so he tries to make him feel it, tries to send waves of it but he also feels how much the wolf hurts, how broken he is, like pieces of him are missing. Like pieces of him have been ripped off of him. 

Steve puts the bowl of water down next to where the food was and goes to sit by the barn’s door. It prevents the wolf from escaping but also, it makes it easier for Steve to protect him in case someone comes for him again. 

He opens his book, taking the bookmark out and slipping it further between the yellow pages of his old paperback. He hears the way the wolf is drinking like it’s been weeks since he had any water and it makes Steve’s heart ache in his chest. There’s the sound of the bowl being turned over and a satisfied huff by the wolf. 

Steve sees from the corner of his eyes, that the wolf sits and looks at him for a very long time. He’s completely still, like he is studying Steve, like he is trying to figure out who he is and why he took care of him. Then, after what feels like forever, the wolf goes back in his shadowed corner of the barn and curls into a ball. This time though, he doesn’t turn his back to Steve, he stays facing him. 

It’s fascinating how he turns almost invisible in the darkness, all Steve can see is the bright silver of his eyes on him. It makes the hair of his arms raise, goosebumps running up to the back of his neck. There is something in the way he stares, it’s unsettling. 

Eventually the eyes close and the wolf goes back to sleep. Steve, goes back to breathing more normally, the rhythm of his heart going back to a much steady beat.

When noon arrives he goes back inside for lunch. He brings Sam to the barn with him in the afternoon, because Sam is good with everyone. Sam is a rock, he will make pretty much anyone feel good and at ease. At home. 

Steve thinks the wolf needs that, Sam’s solid presence.

But it doesn’t go as planned. Not at all. The wolf barks at Sam like he never did at Steve since he had awoken and it surprises him. It surprises the both of them when the wolf takes a few quick steps closer to them like he wants to attack Sam. 

Steve thought that the wolf was okay, that he felt safe but apparently he only feels safe in Steve’s presence. Steve takes a step forward, shielding Sam’s body with his own, and in his most powerful alpha voice, he tells the black wolf to stop.

“Hey! You stop that now! He’s pack. He’s safe. You stand down.”

The wolf stops but it’s almost like it’s against his will, like he doesn’t know why he just listened to Steve so easily when all he wanted to do was jump at Sam’s throat. He lets out what sounds like a frustrated whine but goes back in this corner. He stops barking, but he keeps showing his teeth every once in a while, ears low on his head. 

Steve asks Sam to go get the rest of the pack. He tells the wolf that he’s going to show him who his pack is. 

“I saved you,” Steve says, “ _We_ saved you. We won’t cause you any harm. I don’t know what your last pack did to you, but it’s not like that around here. You can stay, or you can leave. I don’t care,” Steve’s voice cracks on those words because oh, he _cares_. He feels connected to this wolf and he wants to understand the things he feels when he looks into those silver eyes.

“I don’t want you to like them, but you’re gonna respect them. Am I clear?”

The wolf makes that frustrated huffing sound again, looking at the ground and breaking contact with Steve’s red shining eyes.

Nat, Wanda and Clint are now behind Steve, looking worried at what just happened. Getting closer to their Alpha as if to protect him.

“This is my pack,” Steve adds, gesturing to them, “They are good. You don’t need to be afraid.” 

He feels what the wolf feels. Fear, anger, confusion. But at least he calms down. At least he doesn’t look ready to attack them anymore. He goes back to his corner of the barn again, looking ashamed and tired and Steve lets him. He doesn't add anything else. He feels anger within himself too. He thought the wolf was doing well, and then he went on full attack mode on his pack, on his family.

“He’s broken, Steve,” Natasha said, wrapping her arms around one of his, “he trusts you, yes, but it’s going to take a while before he trusts another pack again if he was kicked out of his own.”

“But this morning, he woke up and he never growled at me, not even once. He just stared at me with his big silver eyes!” 

“You’re the one who saved him, he probably sensed it, and you’re an alpha after all,” is what Natasha says but Steve feels like there’s something she’s keeping to herself. There’s more to this wolf than what they are seeing and Steve feels like the whole pack can feel it.

-*-

  
  


For almost two weeks, Steve falls into a routine with the wolf. He wakes up, goes to feed him and then spends most of the day with him in the barn. In the afternoon they go out sometimes but it is obvious the wolf’s left paw is still hurting with the way he walks and still refuses to run. He doesn’t growl at any of the pack members after Steve’s warnings on the very first day. 

But he is also more reluctant to be in Sam and Clint’s presence than Natasha or Wanda. Sam suggests his last pack must have been all men, and that he’s struggling with them now, which totally makes sense.

Wanda is a sweetheart with him, as she is with everyone. She brings the wolf some old blankets to make him a little nest and she sneaks in whenever she can to give him sweet fruits. The wolf loves strawberries and plums apparently, but only the purplish ones, he won’t eat the yellow ones for some reason.

They all feel how the wolf’s fear is slowly going away. How it’s being replaced by curiosity. He’s sleeping better too, and he’s all healed up quicker than they thought. His left paw will stay scarred and rough. It’s been wounded to a point of almost no return, but at least he can stand on it now, the fur growing back as healthy and thick as the rest of his mane.

He gets out of the barn by himself most mornings and he is waiting for Steve at the bottom of the stairs. He eats ravenously now, and he isn’t afraid of eating in front of them.

One sunny afternoon, Steve falls asleep under a tree with his book open on his lap. He remembers that the wolf was lying in the grass a few feet away but when he awakes, they are almost touching. The wolf’s muzzle is right next to Steve’s thigh, and he is resting his head on his paws. He is not sleeping, he is looking up at Steve like he has been watching him all along. 

Steve raises one of his hands, tentatively. He goes as slow as he can, that way he can let the wolf move away if he wants to.

The wolf stays.

Steve’s hand rests softly against the wolf’s neck, fingers digging in his thick black fur. In his hand, straight up to his elbow, his shoulder, then right to the middle of his chest, he feels a shock. It’s like a bolt of electricity is going through his body as soon as he touches him. It makes the wolf exhale a happy sigh and he shuffles closer, resting his head completely on Steve’s thigh, making his heart squeeze almost painfully in his chest. 

“It’s okay. I got you,” Steve mumbles but deep down, he feels like he’s the one being comforted by the wolf instead of the other way around. Steve falls back asleep soon after that, his hand still in the wolf’s fur and the beast head still on his thigh. This time, the wolf closes his eyes too. 

Sam finds them sleeping shortly before dinner time and he smiles at them. It’s been a while since he saw his alpha have such peaceful sleep. He turns around and goes back to the house, deciding to let the two have a moment together.

It’s easier after that, being close to each other, to touch. The wolf is never far behind Steve but he never initiates the touch. He sits in front of Steve and he waits. Waits for Steve’s hands to find their way into his fur, to scratch at his ears. They start napping together a lot, sometimes outside, sometimes in the barn. Steve in his human form, the wolf still a wolf. 

None of the pack says anything, because they too feel how the wolf is opening to them. The closer he gets to Steve, the closer he gets to them too. 

“You could change, you know, you could understand him better if you’re in your wolf form too,” Wanda tells him one morning when the weather is warm and the air is sticky with the first whispers of summer. She’s right, he thinks, he could have done that the very first day. But he was scared of pushing him, of asking for things the wolf might not be ready to share yet. He wanted to gain the wolf’s trust first. 

But she’s right. He could try.

So that morning when he gets out of the house. he removes his clothes, folds them by the front steps and changes into his wolf. He feels it, as soon as he gets on all four legs, he feels the questioning of the wolf in the barn. He feels his curiosity. 

He pads to the barn and when he gets in, the black wolf is waiting for him, his tongue is out and his tail is wagging happily.

Steve takes a step forward and pushes his head under the black wolf’s one, playfully. The black wolf pushes back. 

Communicating as wolves isn’t the same as humans. You can share images, short words and emotion. You can’t form a proper sentence the way you do when you’re on two legs. You’re not someone in a wolf’s body, you become a wolf. 

Steve thinks of the woods, of running, of chasing small birds and eating berries. The reply he gets from the wolf is one of pure happiness. He tries running a few paces, but his front paw still hurts too much and he whines. Walking is good, running isn’t yet.

But it’s okay, they can still walk around the woods, Steve sends him an image of them lying in the grass in the sunlight.

The wolf sends a word, _BUCKY._

Steve is confused. What is a _Bucky_?

But it keeps coming, it’s on loop in his head _BUCKY BUCKY BUCKY BUCKY_ with images of the black wolf. He is a small baby wolf, then he is running in the woods, hunting. Steve sees pictures of him with other wolves as well.

Bucky might be his name. So he sends back _BUCKY_ , and what he gets from the wolf is a bright, powerful _YES!_

They spend most of the day as wolves in the woods surrounding the house. Steve receives images of the wolf hurting. He sees him being attacked by other wolves, of his left paw being broken. Being bitten, pulled at. He feels hurt and pain and rejection. He feels a broken heart. 

Steve walks closer to the wolf and presses against him in comfort. The wolf presses back and Steve’s heart squeezes with a wave of something he can’t name. But he knows he wants to take care of him, he wants him to stay with them. He wants to be close to him and to keep him close.

-*-

One morning on the third week, Steve walks to the barn, holding a basket of fresh strawberries. He is barefoot, with his jeans rolled up at the ankles and a white tank top because the weather is nice and warm. He bites into one of the strawberries, sweet juice dripping down his fingers and he almost chokes on it because in the barn, the wolf is gone. 

In the corner, sitting crossed legs on the pile of blankets is a man instead, wide awake and looking at Steve nervously. The eyes, the piercing silver eyes are the same but this time they are hidden behind long strands of tangled dark hair. His skin is dirty, scars covering his body and mostly his left arm. 

Steve swallows and with his heart frantically beating in his ears he says, “Bucky?”

The man only nods, but his whole body tenses at the call of his name. He starts shaking uncontrollably and he looks on the verge of a panic attack, just like that. Steve drops the basket of strawberries on the ground and runs to him, kneeling in front of him and grabbing the man’s face softly with his strong hands.

“Hey, look at me. You know me, right?”

The voice is rusty, like he forgot how to use it, but he nods, jerkily, he says “Steve” and inside of Steve, something blooms, bright and warm. It goes from his fingertips right to his heart.

“Yes, that’s me.”

Bucky’s hands reach for Steve’s arms, but he doesn’t push him away, he only holds onto him tight like he never wants to let go. “You saved me,” Bucky says again, his voice breaking, not from disuse but from pain. Steve suddenly feels like running until he finds those bastards who hurt Bucky so much. Those assholes who completely broke him. He wants to find them and he wants to break them too, one after another.

“I did, yeah.” 

He’s beautiful, Steve thinks. Even through the dirt, and covered in scars, he is the most beautiful thing Steve has ever laid eyes on. His eyes are bright and open. His lips, even if dried and chapped are still pink and inviting. His face is covered in dark unkempt stubble. It’s like fire in Steve’s veins just looking at him.

 _It’s like coming home_ , he thinks.

“I’m glad you’re okay, Bucky. Would you like to come inside? Have a shower?”

Bucky shakes his head and recoils away from Steve, grabbing at the blankets to hide himself. He looks like a frightened animal even more now then when he was in his actual wolf form. 

“Hey, it’s okay, whatever you’re comfortable with.”

He sees Bucky looking at the strawberries covering the floor at the entrance of the barn with an almost sad look in his eyes. He looks above his shoulder and then he sends a little smile Bucky’s way. He tries to keep the conversation light, “You’re hungry, huh?” 

Bucky nods before looking down at his finger clutching at the fleece blanket on his lap. He looks ashamed of it and no, Steve can’t have that. “You can say it Bucky, it’s alright. I fed you as a wolf, I can feed you as human too. You need it just as much.”

“Thanks, I like fruit.”

Steve laughs at that and it’s enough to have Bucky look up at him, stormy eyes meeting clear sky ones. Steve fights the urge to flash his alpha eyes at him, not in some sort of show of dominance, but because Bucky’s wolf is singing and talking and connecting with Steve’s so hard that he can’t help but feel his body respond to it.

“He likes fruit,” Steve repeats, still smiling and standing up. He looks at the poor strawberries still scattered on the ground and looks back at Bucky, “I’ll get you some clean ones. And new blankets?”

Bucky looks around at the mud caked blanket he is sitting on and nods almost reluctantly. “Maybe, clothes?”

“Of course, I’ll be right back."

Steve walks back to the house with his heart beating hard and fast into his chest, so hard he feels like it’s gonna escape and run into the woods. He knows how panicked he must sound because as soon as he passes the front door, all of the pack is there waiting for him. 

Wanda takes a step forward and grabs his hand softly in her smaller ones, “Steve, is everything okay?”

“He turned back. He’s human. He’s dirty and he is scarred and so skinny and, and-- Beautiful!”

He blurts the last part without meaning to and he blushes hard when he hears Sam’s loud amused snort. Wanda smiles fondly at him, “Oh, Steve. What does he need?”

“Uh. Food and clothes. He wants to stay in the barn I think. When I mentioned the house and a shower he kinda closed up.”

“Do you still have the bag of clothes we put together on the first day?,” Clint calls already halfway up the stairs while Sam and Wanda are walking to the kitchen to get Bucky some food.

Natasha stays with him and looks at him, frowning in concern. She rests her head on his shoulder and he feels a wave of calm washing through him. “So, he’s human again?” She says and at those words his heart starts beating frantically again. “And he’s pretty, huh?” she adds and this time Steve hears the smile in her voice.

“He is,” Steve says, “Nat he looks so broken, his arm, the left one, it’s full of scars. He was so badly hurt by his last pack.”

“Guess we’ll have to show him what a real pack is supposed to be then,” she adds, looking up at him and giving him a small reassuring smile.

Steve smiles back and hugs her closer to him, “Yeah, I guess so.”

-*-

That day, when Steve got back in the barn, Bucky ate the fruit as slowly as he could but it was pretty obvious how hungry he was. He was struggling a little bit with his fingers as well after so long without using them to eat. He sniffed at all the clothes Steve brought him before choosing items that were Steve’s and it made something squeeze in the middle of Steve’s chest. 

It’s been a few days now, and even if he’s dressed in human clothes and walking on his two feet, Bucky still is reluctant to get out of the barn. Steve visits him three times a day for meals and he always stays with him for a few hours. Sometimes they talk, sometimes Steve reads to him and some other times they just sit together in comfortable silence. 

He’s okay with the others visiting him as well, and he talks to them a little even if he clearly isn’t as comfortable as he is with Steve.

He warms up to Wanda the quickest but that’s how the girl is, really. She bribes Bucky into getting inside for a shower. Telling him he could come back outside right after if he wants. 

“You just need to clean up a little, it can’t be comfortable for you. Also, it’s getting a little smelly in there, don’t you think?” she teases him and it’s enough to bring an almost smile to Bucky’s face. Steve’s skin warms up at the sight of it.

“Maybe tomorrow?” Bucky says, hiding his fingers in the sleeves of his (Steve’s) sweater, and hiding his face behind the curtain of his tangly dark hair.

“There you go,” Wanda tells him before standing up and leaving Steve and Bucky alone again.

Steve goes back to his book but really he is only staring at the page, barely seeing the words in front of his eyes because he feels Bucky’s intense stare on him. He doesn’t want to talk first in case Bucky has something to say. He doesn’t want to talk in case Bucky doesn’t want to talk. Steve rarely was with someone who left him so out of his depth. He is usually a pretty charismatic and confident kind of guy but with Bucky he is completely at a loss.

“She’s nice,” Bucky finally says, “all of them are incredibly nice. It’s not something I’m used to.”

Steve looks up and their eyes lock again, and for a long, long moment they just stare at each other in silence. The air is thick and warm between them, filled with something Steve isn’t sure he can name yet, eventually he sends Bucky a bright genuine smile and he says, “We’ll change that.”

-*-

Steve is glad that he’s alone in the house with Bucky the next morning. Sam and Nat left to go run in the woods. Well, that’s what they said but by the way they looked at each other before turning, Steve doesn’t want to know what they are up to. Clint and Wanda went into town to get food and other stuff for the house. So it’s just the two of them. 

Steve brings Bucky upstairs to his ensuite bathroom, thinking it might be more reassuring for him to be surrounded by a familiar smell. He grabs some clothes for Bucky, he still offers him clothes from all three of them, even if it’s kind of useless, knowing which ones he will pick.

Bucky is standing in front of the mirror, looking at himself like he’s not recognizing the reflection he is seeing. He takes in his left arm with sad, worried eyes, tracing scars with trembling fingers. 

“Hey,” Steve murmurs, trying not to scare him. “I got you some clothes for when you’re clean.” Bucky only nods, meeting Steve eyes briefly in the mirror before looking down at his feet. 

“I’ll be in my room, just on the other side of the door, if there’s anything wrong, you call for me okay?”

Bucky nods and walks to the shower to turn it on. His hands are still shaking and his movements are clumsy but he gets it quickly enough. Steam starts filling up the bathroom and Bucky turns around to look at Steve questionably and it’s only then, that he realizes he’s been standing there staring at Bucky like a creep.

“I’ll um. I’ll leave you to it. You take as much shampoo and soap as you want okay? The clothes are there too. We can get you some of your own soon if you want. I’ll… I’ll stop talking now. Okay.”

Before turning around Steve notices how Bucky’s face lights up a little, it’s not a smile but it’s a start. He doesn’t close the door completely on his way out, in case Bucky needs him for something. He sits on his unmade bed and tries to calm down and breathe. 

He’s getting flashes of bright grey eyes and golden skin. The dark shade of his beard and mustache makes Bucky's lips look pinker, fuller. Just thinking about them he feels his own mouth water. He feels a tingle in his fingertips because he wants to run them through Bucky’s hair. He wants to know if his hair is just as smooth and thick as his fur is. 

He knew there was a bond between them, he knew there was something special about Bucky, but Steve wasn’t ready for that intense wave of attraction and want taking him over as soon as Bucky turned human again.

Then, there’s the smell of his shampoo, mixed to Bucky's very own, woodsy smell and it makes Steve dizzy, makes the blood rushing south and _oh no._ He’s so, so fucked.

-*-

Steve manages to control himself as he gets busy with his sketchbook. He sits in the armchair by the window and concentrates on his pencil rather than a very naked Bucky showering just on the other side of the wall. He doodles the trees surrounding the house, but soon enough he finds himself drawing the shape of a dark wolf making his way between them.

He gets lost into his art as he usually does and jumps when he hears the creaking sound of the bathroom door being opened almost half an hour later. Steve swallows hard at the sight in front of him. Bucky looks even better all cleaned up, dark hair pushed away from his face and his beard trimmed up. His cheeks are pink from being scrubbed clean and it gives him a pretty healthy flush.

“I took your razor, I’m sorry,” Bucky mumbles.

Steve puts the sketchbook down and stands up, walking a few steps closer to Bucky but still keeping a safe distance between them. He notices Bucky picked his clothes again even if they are a bit big on him, slipping from his shoulder, the bottom of the sweatpants rolled up once. 

Steve loves the way he looks in them in a way that’s too intense for words.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says instead, “we’ll get you your own razor too, if you want.”

Bucky nods and then he steps from one foot to the other almost uncomfortably. He plays with the hem of the t-shirt he is wearing and looks around Steve’s room curiously. He takes in the pictures of the pack on the walls, the one from Steve’s family as well. He looks around quickly like he wants to take it all in but he’s too shy to do so. 

Bucky then takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, and with his voice barely above a whisper he says “Your smell is weirdly comforting to me.”

Steve’s heart stutters several beats and he smiles at Bucky, “Well I’m glad. I want you to feel safe with us.”

Bucky nods and looks down at this feet, chewing nervously on his bottom lip. Steve has a feeling Bucky won’t speak on his own and he really doesn’t want to push if he’s not ready to talk but there’s one thing he needs to know.

“Bucky?”

“Mmh…”

“Your old pack were they… Were they good people? Did they treat you good?”

Steve regrets his words as soon as they are out of his mouth because Bucky tenses up instantly. He moves like he wants to flee the room and leave and Steve puts a hand on his shoulder, “Please. You don’t have to talk about it if you’re not ready, Bucky. But just tell me yes or no, and I’ll drop the topic for now.”

Bucky exhales a frustrated breath and he only shakes his head no.

“Okay. Thank you for telling me. We’re good people here. We’ll take care of you, okay?”

“...Okay.”

“Now, do you really want to stay in the barn, or do you want to sleep in a real bed inside the house?”

Bucky smiles and gives a small laugh to Steve before looking up, “I think a bed couldn’t hurt.”

-*-

  
  


There’s only two remotely free rooms in the house. In the basement, next to Wanda’s space, there’s a small room that could be converted into a bedroom. Bucky shakes his head, saying it’s too dark for him. Too cold. 

Steve nods understandably, and walks him upstairs again. On the first floor there’s the kitchen and the living area and Clint’s room since he’s pretty much the first one awake every morning. On the second floor, there’s Steve’s bedroom, Natasha and Sam’s room and what Steve uses as his art room. There’s a sofa bed there. it’s old but surprisingly comfortable and apart from the fact that it smells a bit like paint and that there’s Steve’s art hung up everywhere, it’s pretty much the brightest room in the house.

Bucky nods when they get in, taking in all of Steve’s sketches and paintings hanging around with impressed wide eyes. 

“It’s your space, I can’t take it,” Bucky says.

“Don’t be silly,” Steve says shaking his head, “If it’s the room you want, it’s the room you’ll get okay?”

“It’s too much…” Bucky whispers, eyes glued on one of Steve’s latest paintings of a winter scenery full of blues and purples and bright whites.

“I can paint anywhere, the living room is more than big enough. You need a room, Bucky. You can’t sleep in the barn anymore. We’ll just open the windows to clear the paint fumes and it will be yours.”

They hear the noises of Wanda and Clint who just came back from town, the both of them chatting happily. Steve senses how Bucky instantly gets nervous but he reaches out for him, cupping his elbow to stop him from running away. “Come on, Bucky.”

Steve notices waves of happiness and fondness coming out of Bucky whenever he calls his name. It’s almost like he hasn’t been called his proper name in years. Steve tries to use it as much as he can. To put as much warmth into it as possible. He can feel Bucky reaching for him, for his bond, but it’s tentative. Shy. Like he is scared of getting into another pack too soon and Steve completely understands. 

But he knows more than anyone that, sometimes, the pack choses you and you have absolutely no choice but to surrender to it. 

They walk down the stairs and Clint and Wanda are unpacking the groceries in the fridge. Clint does a double take as he sees Bucky while Wanda gives him a friendly, encouraging smile. Bucky stays a few steps behind Steve’s like it’s safer that way. Looking at them with wide calculating eyes.

He ends up giving them a small nod and Clint smiles warmly at him before going back to the groceries. Wanda steps around Steve to get closer to him and she rests a small hand on Bucky’s right arm carefully, just a comforting touch. Bucky lets her, even gives her a little smile as she says she’s glad he’s okay. 

“He’s gonna stay in the art room,” Steve tells them, and they both nod in understanding like it’s what makes the most sense. “Clint I’ll need your help to clear it up after lunch if it’s okay?”

“Of course, Steve.”

“I can help,” Bucky says, lifting his chin up, almost defiantly.

“You need rest, Bucky,” Wanda tells him, “You’ve been in your wolf form a very long time, now you need to rest and sleep on something else than the ground and get better okay?”

Bucky looks at Steve like he’s waiting for his permission but Steve isn’t that kind of alpha. His pack, they do as they please as long as it doesn’t put anyone at risk. Bucky does need to rest but he’s not the one who’s gonna force him to do so. He only shrugs and he sees surprise in Bucky wide eyes, he’s lost for a moment like he’s not used to making decisions by himself.

“I- I do feel a bit tired. Yes.”

“Then, when your room is ready you can take a nap, alright?” Steve tells him, squeezing at Bucky’s shoulder and his little smile is finally directed at Steve and it’s like honey seeping through his veins at the sight of it. Steve feels like he’s quickly going to become addicted to this smile and vows to try to witness it as often as he can. 

Bucky helps them unload the groceries and then he goes into the basement with Wanda, to do God knows what. Wanda just softly grabs his hand and pulls him downstairs with her. Clint and Steve exchange a curious look but Steve isn’t worried. She will probably just show him her room and be her happy bubbly self and try to make Bucky feel a bit more at ease.

After that, they go and tidy up Steve’s art room to turn it into a safe space for Bucky. He leaves the big winter canvas on the wall, remembering the way Bucky looked at it earlier. They remove all of Steve’s sketches, though, and they open the window wide and sweep up the floors. Clint goes to the basement in their linen closet to grab some clean sheets and there’s laughter in his eyes when he gets back. 

“They are getting along just fine,” is all he says, before pulling open the sofa bed and putting the sheets on them. They get pillows and an old duvet on top of it as well. Steve goes to his room and gets one of his bedside tables, the ones he barely uses anyway and the lamp on it and puts them next to the bed. _Bucky’s bed_. 

Steve feels better now, knowing Bucky has his own space. Knowing he is going to sleep under their roof instead of in the barn. He has the silly hope that Bucky will like the space. That he will be comfortable sleeping here, that he will think the sheets soft and warm. That he will know how safe he is, with Steve only next door. 

-*-

Natasha and Sam get back to the house mid afternoon.

“Is he in here?” Sam asks, sniffing the air, “The barn is empty, but it still smells like him.”

“He’s asleep upstairs,” Steve says.

“Oh! Is he in your bed?” Natasha muses, smirking at him, and poking his sides.

Steve instantly blushes at that, _ah! I wish._ He turns his back to them to hide the color of his cheeks even if he is well aware that they both noticed.

“We turned the art room into a space for him. He thought the basement was a bit cold and dark.”

He hears them both snicker behind his back and they make their way to the kitchen for snacks. 

They are always ravenous after spending some time in the woods so Steve lets them eat and goes back to his book, sinking back into the couch. If he concentrates enough, if he closes his eyes and just listens, he can hear the soft in and out breathing of Bucky as he sleeps. He is still a bit restless, like he is having bad dreams. But he sleeps. He is safe and warm and it gives so much comfort to Steve. 

Bucky ends up sleeping for the rest of the day, he skips dinner and none of them want to wake him up, not knowing when was the last time he slept in a proper bed. As they all go to sleep in their respective rooms in the late evening, Steve goes out on the front porch to enjoy the pretty summer night. He likes just lying there under the blanket of stars and just being.

Steve is a bit nervous because it’s about to be a whole month since he found Bucky in the woods. It’s about to be the next full moon, Bucky’s first one with them. They usually go out as a pack and spend the night together hunting small animals and just running around and having fun. But will Bucky join them? Will he just leave as soon as he turns into a wolf again?

If Steve is being honest, he doesn’t want him to leave. Like ever. He wants Bucky to join his pack. He wants Bucky as his mate. There’s no way denying it. He knows the name of those things he feels for him, even so soon, so fast. He knows the way he felt as soon as their eyes first met, bright blue and silver. The bright golden wolf with the wolf dark as the night.

They were meant to find each other. Steve was meant to find this broken beast in the woods and bring him in. He wants and he needs to help Bucky find his way again, find out who he is and where he belongs. He knows it’s with him, with them. He hopes Bucky knows it too. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m scared,” Bucky finally says out loud, “With my last pack, they made me do terrible things. I’m scared that once I change again I would… go feral maybe? I don’t know...”
> 
> Steve grabs at Bucky’s free hand, the one that’s covered in scars. He traces them softly with his thumb and he feels Bucky stiffen up next to him, he feels him almost pulling away. Steve shakes his head and squeezes softly at Bucky’s fingers. He brings them to his lips, pressing a soft kiss against Bucky’s pink knuckles. He feels and he hears the way Bucky’s breath stutters at the contact, feeling the wave of warmth and gratefulness coming from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to point out there is description of physical/sexual/psychological abuse in this chapter. Bucky opens up to Steve about what happened to him in his other pack.

Bucky sleeps a lot, which means he is getting, somehow, comfortable enough inside the house. He starts, pretty quickly, to help Natasha and Sam cook most nights and he listens carefully to all the tips Sam is giving him. They easily fall into some kind of banter, the two of them; always pushing and throwing shades, teasing, and playing pranks on each other but, they are always smiling.

Steve heard Bucky apologize to Sam about that first night in the barn, about how he snapped at him. Sam brushes it off easily, telling Bucky it’s normal to be frightened sometimes, that it’s normal not to trust strangers when you’ve been hurt.

Wanda often brings Bucky into the woods with her when she goes to collect some herbs and plants and flowers. Clint goes with them most of the time and teaches Bucky all about the birds and animals in the forest. He tells him what they can hunt, and what they can’t. 

With Natasha, it’s a bit scary how easily they get along because they do it in such a quiet way. They could be watching TV in silence or just sitting by the lake, and Steve feels it, how she calms Bucky just by being there. Steve thinks Bucky tells her about his previous pack, about what he went through before, what they did to him.

It stings a little, that he’s not the one Bucky goes to but, at the same time, Steve is relieved that he is talking to someone who’s trustworthy. Also, Natasha went through her own share of trouble before she joined Steve’s pack and if there is one person who understands Bucky, it’s her.

The full moon is getting closer too, just a few days ahead. It’s going to be Bucky’s first one with them. Steve feels Bucky’s nervousness in his own blood.

He knows his pack. They are full of restless energy the few days before the full moon. Wanda bakes like crazy, Clint is borderline annoying with how excited he is about it, and Sam and Natasha well, let’s say they burn the energy in a way Steve prefers not to talk about… So it’s obvious to him, that the emotions Bucky is feeling are quite different from the rest of the pack.

When Friday rolls in, Steve notices the dark circles under Bucky’s eyes and how jittery and anxious he looks. Steve joins him on the front porch that morning just after escaping outside with his cup of coffee full of sugary vanilla creamer. He sits next to Bucky on top of the steps, pressing his shoulder, hip, and knee against Bucky’s body for comfort. He feels him relax against him, hears him exhale shakily as well.

“It’s going to be okay, Bucky. I can stay with you the whole time. Sometimes we go separate ways, sometimes we stay together. But we always stay in those woods…You’ll be safe.”

Bucky only nods silently but he doesn’t pull away from Steve, in reality, he never does. He seeks Steve’s touch just as often and never shies away from it. It’s normal for werewolves to be more touchy, to cuddle, and to seek comfort from the other members of their pack. 

Steve loves to nap with Wanda, she clings to him like a koala and she talks cute nonsense in her sleep. He loves watching TV with Sam’s head on his lap, scratching his fingers over Sam’s short hair. Natasha almost needs a point of contact with any of them at all hours and Clint gives the best hugs, where he just holds the back of your neck and breathes you in like it’s the best moment of his life. 

Their touch brings Steve peace and comfort, he loves knowing they are all taking good care of each other. 

But with Bucky? With Bucky it’s _electric_ . It sends shivers all over his skin, it’s like a shock through his heart. He wakes up needing it, craving it. The simple contact of fingers against his skin feels like a revelation. It’s never been that intense with anyone, not even his past lovers. He doesn’t know how to bring it up to Bucky, how to put it in words. Because it’s obvious by now that, the both of them, they are _mates_. 

It’s obvious also, that Bucky feels it too, but the last thing Steve wants is to push too far. He doesn’t want to bring Bucky to a place he doesn’t want to be. He wants him to set the pace. Bucky’s the one who’s been rejected, the one who’s been broken, and Steve might be an alpha, yes, but he’s also human and he has a heart. This heart beats so hard and so fast for Bucky, it’s like it was never fully beating before they met. And Steve, only after a few weeks, is ready to do everything it takes to win Bucky’s heart in return. 

Natasha told him it was pretty bad, what had happened to him. She told him that Bucky will tell him when he’s ready. Apparently, the wounds they found on Bucky that day weren’t the worst thing to happen to him. She told Steve to go slow, to be soft and tender with him, that it’s exactly what Bucky needs because that’s what he lacked with his previous pack. Steve is more than ready to give him all of that and more.

“I’m scared,” Bucky finally says out loud, “With my last pack, they made me do terrible things. I’m scared that once I change again I would… go feral maybe? I don’t know...”

Steve grabs at Bucky’s free hand, the one that’s covered in scars. He traces them softly with his thumb and he feels Bucky stiffen up next to him, he feels him almost pulling away. Steve shakes his head and squeezes softly at Bucky’s fingers. He brings them to his lips, pressing a soft kiss against Bucky’s pink knuckles. He feels and he hears the way Bucky’s breath stutters at the contact, feeling the wave of warmth and gratefulness coming from him. 

“When I found you, you weren’t feral.”

“I was too tired, too hurt to fight. And I told you, there was something about your smell that I just couldn’t fight.”

“Bucky, I _had_ to find you. I had to run to you and save you. We never talked about that night Bucky, but, I woke up and I've never been more scared in my life. It was like something inside of me got broken, I just got out of bed and I ran and I changed into my wolf without even noticing. I _had_ to get to you. I won’t let anything happen to you tonight, and I won’t let you hurt anyone, even less your own self. I promise… Do you believe me?”

Bucky’s eyes are steady on Steve’s but they are also wide and vulnerable. He nods and he reaches with his other hand to keep Steve’s one in place. With a watery sigh, he rests his head on Steve’s shoulder, their hands still linked. “I’m glad you found me,” he says at last, against the bare skin of Steve’s neck. Steve rests his head on top of Bucky’s and he nods, suddenly tongue-tied, suddenly so emotional and grateful he found that beautiful man and that he got to bring him into his life; even if he would have chosen different circumstances. 

-*-

When the sun sets that night and the sky turns to bright shades of pinks and oranges, they all go outside on the front porch and start removing their clothes. Bucky, of course, is shy about the whole thing since he’s new to this pack. They all turn their backs to him, to respect his privacy, and start changing into their wolves. 

Sam is the first one, with his thick fur dark and so smooth and shiny under the last few rays of daylight. Natasha’s coat is bright red just like her hair is, green eyes shining playfully as she starts pushing against Sam. Clint turns into a dark blond wolf, a long white line going all the way down his back to the tip of his tail. Wanda is the smallest of all of them, her fur a beautiful auburn color, darker than Natasha’s vibrant one. 

Steve turns into his golden wolf, bigger than the rest of them. He notices Bucky is still on the front porch, looking at all of them with fear brimming in his eyes. He is clutching what looks like his t-shirt in front of him to hide the nudity of his human form. Steve would have laughed at him because as wolves, they don’t really care.

He walks towards him and stops at the bottom of the steps, waiting.

Bucky hesitantly walks closer to him, like he’s pulled by some magnetic force. He reaches a hand and buries it in Steve’s thick fur with a sigh of relief. He closes his eyes and tries to steady his breathing, hands still in Steve’s fur. Steve pushes at his hip with his muzzle and huffs, waiting impatiently for Bucky to turn so they can communicate again. 

He looks back at the rest of the pack. He sends them away, _GO_ , he thinks and they all start patting away from them. Natasha stops and looks back and Steve huffs again to her. _It’s okay. I’ve got this_ , he is trying to say, and she understands because soon enough she’s running and crashes into Sam, both of them rolling around into the leaves and branches.

Steve decides to just lay there at Bucky’s feet and wait. Does he want to stay human tonight? Naked as the day he was born? Steve’s fine with it. He won’t go anywhere without Bucky. He lays on his stomach, head on his paws and he yawns, waiting. Steve hears a laugh, and then a frustrated sigh... followed by the sound of Bucky finally sitting down on the ground with him

Steve loves the way Bucky’s fingers feel in his fur and he closes his eyes. A few moments pass, and he hears the bugs and the night birds and other animals slowly waking up in the forest. Suddenly, the fingers stop scratching his ears. When he opens his eyes, he meets Bucky’s silvery eyes but around them is the beautiful dark form of his black wolf.

_BUCKY!_

_STEVE!_

Steve starts running around Bucky playfully and pushing at him and they roll around in the dirt with happy little yips. Steve ends up pining Bucky’s wolf and licking his face and he feels Bucky go still and he sends the word _SCARED._

Steve says _NO!_ and he goes running for the woods, looking back and hoping Bucky will follow him. Thankfully, he does.

The night goes well, nothing happens, really; it’s one of their usual full moons. They run, they hunt, they eat tart fruits in the bushes. Bucky doesn’t really go to the rest of the pack but stays by Steve’s side instead. He doesn’t go feral, doesn’t try to run away. He plays with Steve and they eat together and it’s one of the best full moons Steve’s had in a long time.

Bucky is a bit slower than Steve is used to, his front paw obviously still hurting, but he’s strong and Steve is impressed by it. He can’t wait to run around and hunt with Bucky when he is back at the best of his shape. 

As always, they end up in a little clearing as the sky starts to get lighter and the stars get dimmer. They all rest in the lush grass and flowers and fall asleep in a pile of colorful wolves. Steve and Bucky are curled together while the rest of the pack snoozes peacefully around them and there’s nowhere else he’d rather be. 

When Steve opens his eyes a few hours later, he is human again and so is Bucky. The rest of the pack is gone and the early morning sun is warming up his skin. Their bodies and the grass are shiny and damp with dew. It’s sticking to their hair and their lashes.

As Steve slowly awakes, he notices how he is curled up behind Bucky, spooning him. Bucky’s head is resting against Steve’s bicep, dark hair cascading on his pale skin. Steve’s other hand is held by Bucky and pressed against his chest. 

They usually go back to the house just as the sun rises and they change there, but it seems the rest of the pack abandoned them to their morning cuddles and Steve can’t say he’s mad about it.

Steve breathes in the earthy smell of Bucky’s hair. It smells like the woods, like morning and flowers and sweat. It's intoxicating. 

It’s also enough for Steve to notice that he is painfully hard, and he doesn’t dare move a single muscle of his body as soon as he becomes aware of the situation. He doesn’t want Bucky to feel like he has to do anything about it; he wakes up with boners all the time with the rest of the pack and they just laugh it off.

But this, this feels different. This feels important, like a step Steve’s not sure he’s ready to take yet. He tries to think of disgusting things and wills it away, but the feel of Bucky’s skin against his, his smell filling up his nose, it’s like all of his senses are set ablaze by the single proximity of the man in his arms. 

Thankfully, Bucky starts to stir awake, ending Steve’s inner monologue. He feels the way Bucky leans back against him as he stretches his sore muscles and then he goes painfully still and takes one deep breath before looking over his shoulder. Bucky relaxes once his eyes set on Steve’s but he is quick to roll over and away from him. 

Steve misses the warmth instantly.

“Morning?” he says, sitting up and folding his hands on his lap, trying to hide his _condition_ as best as he can. He can’t help but notice Bucky doing the same and it sends a thrill down his spine. 

“Morning,” Bucky answers, looking around and trying to gather his belongings, “Did we just fall asleep in the middle of the clearing and turn back human?"

“Yup!” Steve says awkwardly and he’s never been that uncomfortable sitting naked in front of someone else before. 

He suddenly wants to map every single inch of Bucky’s skin like he’s never seen him shirtless or pantless before, it’s pathetic. There’s one single emotion pumping in his blood right now and it’s pure want. The animal part of him just wants to take Bucky apart right here under the morning sun but, no. _Focus Steve! Get your mind out of the gutter!_

“Do we have to walk back to the house completely naked?” Bucky asks and there’s a tiny little smile pulling at his full pink lips and it makes Steve’s face warm up again. Bucky looks amused by the whole thing while Steve, the alpha, is completely mortified! What an alpha he is, really! 

“Um, yeah I guess. We’re kind of close at least. Can’t say the whole pack won’t be on the front porch watching us do the walk of shame, though...” 

It makes Bucky laugh and his cheeks turn pink as well as he looks down at Steve. “I’ve never met an alpha like you,” he says, his smile turning soft and fond. 

Steve stands up, his hands still in front of him and he bumps his shoulder into Bucky, “That’s a good thing right?” he says in a teasing tone.

“Yeah, Steve, it’s great.”

And just like that, they walk back to the house, both of them butt naked, making their way into the woods and between the trees. They keep giggling at the whole situation and sending each other amused like looks and smiles. They could have turned into wolves again, but it’s more difficult, after spending the whole night in that form already, to change as soon as the morning after. 

And just as Steve has predicted, his pack are all sitting on the front porch, looking tired but amused. Clint even catcalls them, whistling loudly and it makes Bucky laugh bright and loud, and it warms Steve from head to toe.

-*-

Sadly, what Steve thought would have helped them become closer, does kind of the opposite. Bucky always stays in his proximity, but it’s a bit awkward. They don’t touch as often as they did before that night. Bucky often takes a step back when Steve tries to get closer or touch him. It’s not fear or disgust it’s just _bizarre_. Steve curses himself, thinking that he made Bucky uncomfortable on that full moon but he really doesn’t understand what he could have done to have Bucky almost avoiding him. 

They were both touching, cuddling. Both of them were equally aroused and Bucky was just fine when they walked to the house. But it’s like, with the hours and days passing, Bucky got angstier, almost nervous. 

Bucky keeps sleeping a lot, more than any of them, and Steve starts to think it might not be because of him recovering from what he went through. It looks like it’s just a Bucky thing. He loves taking naps. He loves going back to his room on rainy days and burying in his thick blankets. Or when it’s warm and sunny, he loves laying on the chaise longue on the front porch, and more than once Steve finds him asleep there, his skin turning pink under the sun.

Bucky asked Steve if he could borrow a few of his books and he goes through them at an impressive pace. Steve loves to ask him, when he brings one back, what he thought about it. He loves how passionate Bucky gets when he loved them, how expressive and intense he gets when he didn’t.

Bucky still gets nightmares, Steve thinks he will probably get them for a very long time. He hears him, often at night, making distressed noises. Sometimes Bucky just gets up and gets out of the house. Steve looks from his bedroom window and he sees Bucky sometimes walking to the barn, other nights he just stays on the porch. 

A week after the full moon Bucky goes into the woods and Steve stays there by his window looking at the dark trees, barely breathing, until Bucky’s silhouette finally comes back just as the sun is about to rise.

Both of them are pretty tired for the rest of the day, Steve doesn’t dare to give an honest answer when Wanda asks him how he slept. He feels Bucky’s curious eyes on him and he feels bad for staying up most of the night waiting for him, watching him. 

Steve goes for a run, hoping it would clear his mind but sadly it doesn’t work. As he runs, he keeps thinking of Bucky’s warm body against his own, his nose in his soft hair. The way his body is getting softer in places it used to be skin and bones before. He’s eating better and he’s gaining weight and Steve wants to press his face into the warm, soft skin of his stomach.

He thinks about running with Bucky, both of them as wolves, and how he never felt so good, so free, with any other wolf before. His mind, awake or asleep, is just pictures of Bucky on loop, again and again. It’s even worse now that he knows the feeling of his skin, that he knows what it is to wake up next to the other man. 

When he gets to the house, he finds Bucky asleep in his usual spot on the front porch, a book open against his chest. He walks to him, wanting to wake him up because his neck is at such a bad angle he’s going to hurt himself. He should move inside the house and go to his bed. 

Steve pushes a few wild strands of hair away from Bucky’s forehead, letting his hand slide from this temple to his cheek, “Bucky” he whispers, rubbing comforting circles with his thumb against Bucky’s scruffy jawline. Bucky sighs, happily and presses his face against Steve’s warm hand, his eyes fluttering open, their color bright under the sun. 

“Steve…” he mumbles, smiling sleepily like Steve is the best thing he could have woken up to. He closes his eyes again, and Steve chuckles, “Buck, you gotta move inside, you’re gonna get a crick in your neck.”

“Will you nap with me?” he says, words heavy with sleep, and Steve’s heart beats hard and fast into his chest. 

“You want to?”

“Warm,” is all Bucky says, and Steve grabs him under the shoulders and helps him up, guiding him inside the house and upstairs. Bucky cuddles into his side, skin still hot from the sunlight. When they get to the second floor Bucky takes a deep breath and crinkles his nose, “You smell.”

Steve smiles down at him, loving every single thing about holding a sleepy Bucky into his arms, “I went running. Go to bed and I'll join you after my shower, okay?”

“M’kay” Bucky says, but instead of walking to his own room, he makes his way towards Steve’s and falls face-first onto the bed. Snores are coming from Bucky before Steve even has time to grab some clean clothes for after his shower. 

And when he emerges from the bathroom, skin damp still for how eager he was to join Bucky in bed, he barely has time to lay down before the other man holds onto him like a needy octopus. It’s a matter of minutes really before Steve falls asleep with an armful of his mate.

-*-

When they wake up, it’s almost dinner time and they go downstairs in silence. It’s Steve’s turn to prepare food and Bucky wordlessly starts helping him. They cook together in comforting silence and it works. Steve isn’t the best of cook, so he usually goes with easy enough meals when it’s his turn and Bucky is there right next to him to fix his tiny mistakes or add some insightful opinions. 

The rest of the pack joins them once everything is ready and the weather is still nice and warm so they decided to eat on the front porch. 

Steve loves to watch Bucky interact with them, he loves the way he is slowly opening up to everyone. He smiles more, makes jokes, and is much more comfortable. He stays close to Wanda and doesn’t flinch when she touches his arm or leans into him when he makes her laugh. He looks at her fondly and it makes Steve wonder if Bucky once had younger sisters. The longing in his eyes when he looks at her, it’s like she’s reminding him of someone dear.

Sam keeps teasing him, and Bucky gives right back and Natasha looks at them with fake annoyance, her head on Sam’s shoulders, their fingers intertwined. 

Steve suddenly feels overwhelmed about how much he loves his pack, his family. He feels so grateful that they found Bucky and that they are treating him with so much love already. They accepted him as theirs as quickly as Steve, and it sends a warm sense of pride through his body. 

Once they are done eating they all make their way inside, Sam and Nat saying they will take care of the dishes. They leave Bucky and Steve together, both sitting at opposite ends of the table; eyes fixed on each other, both waiting for the other one to say something.

Steve takes a deep breath and at the same time, they speak the other’s name. Bucky looks down at his hands, palms down on the table, “You go ahead,” he tells Steve in that small voice he uses when he feels uncomfortable and afraid.

“Bucky...” Steve says again, “I want to apologize for the other morning, after the full moon? I… I feel like I made you uncomfortable and it wasn’t my intention.”

“Uncomfortable?” Bucky asks, brows knitted in confusion.

“Yeah, we… We’ve barely been talking or touching or spent any time together, apart from this afternoon nap. Since we woke up together that morning, it’s been weird? I don’t know what your last pack did to you, but I feel like it was pretty bad. And I know I shouldn't have gotten close to you that way, touched you that way without asking first. I made you uncomfortable and-”

Steve is interrupted by Bucky standing up from his side of the table and getting closer to Steve. He kneels before him, grabbing at Steve’s bigger hands and holding them between his own. 

“Steve, don’t you feel it? Don’t you feel them too, the things you’re making me feel? I’m not uncomfortable you idiot, I’m fucking _terrified_ because I never felt that way before.”

“ _Oh_...” 

Bucky laughs nervously, “I was grateful enough that you found me, that you saved me. But on top of everything, there’s those _feelings_ and the way I feel addicted to your smell Steve! My last alpha, he was bad... He abused me. Physically. Verbally… He abused me in all the ways he could…” His voice gets thicker and looks down at their intertwined hands instead of Steve’s eyes.

“And I know, you’re not like that, Steve. I see it, how you are with me, with the others. I see the kind of alpha you are but, I’m scared. I’m broken, inside and out and I… I don’t know what kind of special thing you see in me, but I see it in your eyes when you look at me. I know you feel it too, but I’m so scared of disappointing you.”

It’s the most words Bucky talked since they found him, Steve feels like laughing hysterically all of a sudden, he feels like crying, he feels like running to find that fucking asshole who dared calling himself an alpha and hurt Bucky. But all he does, all he says is; “Bucky, I think you’re my mate.”

Bucky answers with a surprised laugh that’s halfway through happiness and a sob and he brings Steve’s hands to his lips, pressing a tender kiss against his knuckles. 

“I think so too.”

Steve stands up, pulling Bucky to his feet as well and they walk down the front stairs to the big wooden swing Clint hung to one of their biggest trees last summer. He sits down and pulls Bucky closer to his side, and when Bucky rests his head on Steve’s shoulder, Steve leans his own on top of Bucky’s, taking a deep breath to calm down his crazy heart.

“I’m sorry I was weird,” Bucky says, idly playing with Steve’s fingers, “I was just overwhelmed. I’ve never felt those things before. I never felt safe and warm and good the way you make me feel. I’m used to being yelled at. Slapped. When he hugged me, it was to bring me into his bed after. You… You never do that. And I was…” he trails off, only shrugging and never finishing his sentence.

“Thank you, for telling me. I am deeply sorry you went through that, Buck. I won’t ever make you do stuff you don’t want to. We can only hold each other like that if that’s what you want. I’m good with it. Having you here with me, in my pack is more than enough.”

He feels Bucky hugging him around the waist, feels the way his neck feels damp where Bucky’s face is. He starts swinging them, softly, as the sun slowly disappears in the sky, painting it like it’s on fire. _Tomorrow will be warm_ , Steve thinks, remembering the way his mother used to read the sky and the clouds when he was younger. 

After a few moments, Bucky sniffs and speaks again, taking his face off of Steve’s neck to look at him, there’s a shy amused smile on his face, “You mean, you don’t wanna kiss me?”

Steve looks at him, his face warming up and it makes Bucky laugh, “Oh my God! What kind of alpha blushes like that,” he says, fingers touching softly at the warm red of Steve’s cheeks.

Steve holds Bucky’s hand against his face and looks down at his smiling mouth, then back up at his eyes. 

“I wanted to kiss you since I first saw you in your human form. You were dirty and your hair and beard filled with knots and yet, I wanted to drop on my knees in front of you and kiss some love back into your life.”

“Then do it.”

And it’s soft, like the warm summer breeze surrounding them. Soft like the way Steve is holding Bucky’s face into his hands and how Bucky’s hands are resting on Steve’s waist. Soft like the clouds floating above them in the darkening sky. 

They stay there until the night surrounds them and the stars start to shine. When they finally get back inside the house, the rest of the pack is fast asleep and when Bucky tries to make his way into his own room, Steve holds him back and pulls him in his space instead. They kiss lazily until sleep takes them both hostage.

-*-

Just like that, the painful awkwardness of the last few days is lifted. They go back to spending most of their days together. Bucky sitting in a room when Steve is painting and just watching him, or reading, or looking up things on Wanda’s laptop. 

Bucky starts joining Steve and Sam when they go running in the mornings and soon enough he keeps pace with them. Steve is so proud to see that he is fully back on his feet. 

They don’t always sleep in the same room, it’s like both of them don't want to be too much, too soon and want to leave the other their own space. But if Steve’s honest with himself, he wants Bucky in his bed, all night and every night. He sleeps so much better with the other man curled up against his side or spooning him, his face pressed between Steve’s shoulders. 

He loves waking up with long brown hair tangled in his own, loves to see Bucky’s lashes flutter as he slowly wakes up. He loves more than anything, the way Bucky’s silvery eyes fill with warmth as soon as they find Steve’s.

Some nights, when they sleep in separate rooms, Bucky ends up getting nightmares. It wakes Steve up, the way Bucky whines and tosses and turns. The first time it happened he just walked to Bucky’s room and got into bed with him, waking him up slowly from his bad dreams. Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky’s shaky frame and just spoke softly to him until he gasped awake, tears in his eyes. 

They fell back asleep just like that, with Steve playing with Bucky’s hair until he calmed down.

The next time it happens, Bucky is the one walking to Steve’s room and slipping under the sheets claiming he got another nightmare. “Do you wanna talk about it?” Steve whispers into the darkness of his room and Bucky just shakes his head.

“No, just hold me, that helps.”

And Steve does, he holds him tight and he tries his best to protect him from the bad dreams invading Bucky’s mind. He kisses him softly on the lips and tells him to go back to sleep, “I’m not going anywhere, you’re safe with me.”

“I know,” Bucky mumbles against his chest and Steve feels his body relax until he finally falls back asleep. Steve stays awake for a little while after that, just enjoying the feeling of Bucky in his arms, thinking he could just ask Bucky to move in his room with him at this point. They spend almost all of their nights together anyway.

But he also wants to leave Bucky his own space. From what Steve has gathered, his old pack didn’t leave much free will to him. He knows Bucky was forced to do things he didn’t want to, and Steve won’t ever do that to him. He is Bucky’s alpha, yes, to protect him, to guide him, and take care of him. Period. That’s what any good alpha should too. 

Bucky’s last pack clearly was hungry for power and violence. Steve is not like that. 

They didn’t do much more than kiss and cuddle and Steve is totally fine with that. He was tending to his own needs before Bucky arrived. And as much as he wants him, he wants Bucky to want him too. He wants it to happen on Bucky’s terms, whenever he’s ready. 

Steve falls back asleep finally, his fingers slipped under the hem of Bucky’s shirt, pressed into the soft warm skin of his back and with Bucky’s hair tingling at his nose. He falls asleep smiling and he goes until morning.

-*-

One day, the rest of the pack is out and it’s only Bucky and Steve in the house. Steve is painting in the living room. He is wearing old basketball shorts and a loose tank top. Both are already covered in a rainbow of paint droplets. Bucky is sitting on the floor, his back to the couch and he is reading a book, some old sci-fi novel about space. 

“Did you have a mate, before?” Bucky asks him, he’s looking nervously at Steve, his book still open on his lap. They got him his own clothes, but more often than not, he is still wearing Steve’s. It makes him look soft and comfortable and Steve loves it.

As it is, a werewolf can have more than one mate in his life, if one of them dies, for example, the other can find someone else. But more often than not, they spend their whole life with the same person. They can fall in love, they can feel want and need with other people who are not their mates but, it’s nothing compared to what it is with the wolf you're meant to be with.

Steve did have a few flings, some boyfriends and girlfriends here and there through the years. He loved them alright, he treated them well. But they were nothing compared to what he feels just looking at Bucky.

“No,” he says, turning around to look at Bucky fully, “Think I was meant for you all along.”

It makes a beautiful shade of pink spread all over Bucky’s face and he looks down, hiding behind the dark curtain of his long hair. 

Steve puts his brushes and paint down and wipes his hand clean before walking closer to Bucky. He sits on the couch next to him and leans down to push Bucky’s hair away from his face. “Did you?”

Bucky leans into Steve’s touch and closes his eyes. He takes one unsteady breath and says, “No. He did his best to make me believe that he was but, I know now, the way I feel about you, with you, that he was not my mate.”

Steve’s hand is still on Bucky’s face, his thumb rubbing comforting circles against the scruffy skin of Bucky’s square jawline, “Can I kiss you?” he says, and Bucky nods. 

“Of course you can, you always can.”

“And I’m always going to ask because I don’t wanna be like he was with you.”

Bucky lifts his hand to hold onto Steve’s and his eyes suddenly turn intense and he says, “Steve, you will never be like him, you’re so good to me can’t you see?”

And just like that Bucky closes the distance and presses his soft lips against Steve’s awaiting ones. Suddenly Bucky is standing up, lips never leaving Steve’s and he pushes against his chest until he is sitting all the way back against the cushions and Bucky climbs on his lap. 

“Bucky,” Steve tries to say but Bucky doesn’t stop kissing, his hands running up and down Steve’s body like he can’t decide where he wants to touch him the most. The kiss turns frantic and Steve’s hands find their way to Bucky’s waist. He holds him tight and it’s enough to have Bucky whine into his mouth and his hips roll a few times against Steve’s, making it obvious by now both of them are getting hard.

“Is this okay?” Steve asks, breathless before moving his lips to Bucky’s neck and pressing open-mouthed kisses against his golden skin. But Bucky’s body goes still, his hips stop moving even if his heart is still beating fast and his breath is still short. As Bucky stops moving, so does Steve’s lips

“Yes, I just…Can we slow down?” Bucky asks, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Mmh” Steve hums against his neck and he wraps his arms tighter around Bucky to turn their embrace into a comforting hug, “Of course we can.”

They are still hard, their skin is still hot and Steve can still hear and feel the drum of Bucky’s heart as they are so close to each other. He loves the way arousal smells on Bucky, it makes him dizzy, almost drunk on it. But if Bucky wants to stop, then Steve doesn’t want to keep going either. He feels Bucky’s distress before he even speaks out loud again, Steve is frowning and just holds him closer.

“I’m sorry…” Bucky says and Steve feels tears against his neck, where Bucky’s face is pressed, he feels him shake and tremble against him. 

“Hey, don’t be sorry, sweetheart, it’s okay. We’ll go at your pace, there’s no rush. Please don’t cry.”

But It only makes Bucky cry harder, sobs suddenly racking his body, and Steve’s heart cracks open at that. He starts rocking him softly, playing with his hair, whispering reassuring words in his ear. 

“Did I touch you somewhere you don’t like?” Steve finally asks, hands going up and down Bucky’s back. The tears are still rolling down his face and he still feels a bit shaky in Steve’s arms. Bucky doesn’t look like he wants to move away from their embrace and Steve takes it as a good sign but he is still a bit worried about what just happened.

“They never listened, before, when I told them I wanted to stop,” Bucky says, his voice still rough and weak because of all the tears. 

Steve feels his throat closing up, he feels tears filling up his own eyes. He feels anger so intense and bright, red and hot in his veins. He wants to find them, Bucky’s so-called last pack and he wants to rip off all their limbs and their heads. He wants to kill them for what they did to Bucky. He hides his face into Bucky’s hair and he takes a deep inhale of this smell he loves so much, trying to ground himself as best as he can, but he can’t stop the tears from falling. 

“I will always listen to you, you understand?”

Bucky nods, face still hiding against Steve’s neck and shoulder and he holds tighter onto Steve and it’s enough for now. They spend a little while on the couch like that, holding each other and just, being together, in silence. Taking in the other’s scent, their warmth. 

The rest of the day, Bucky is pretty closed up. He doesn’t talk much to anyone and Steve is pretty much the same. Steve gets worried looks from Nat when she gets back and he shakes his head at her. She understands that he doesn’t want to talk, she understands what they might have talked about while they were gone.

As always, Wanda feels and understands Bucky’s needs more than anyone, sometimes more than Steve himself. Her new hobby is to knit, and she brings Bucky with her in the basement to show him what she’s been learning to do. 

After dinner, Sam grabs Steve into a hug, he holds him tight and for a long moment, he holds him until he feels Steve relax against him. Then, he takes a step back and with a hand on Steve’s neck, their forehead pressed against each other, he says, “I know it’s rough man, what you’re going to learn about him. But never forget all the progress he’s done since he’s here. That’s because of you. You’re good to him.”

Steve loves Sam so much in that moment, he feels like breaking down in tears all over again. But he doesn’t, he stays strong and he thanks him with another bone-cracking hug. 

That night, when Steve finally gets in bed, Bucky doesn’t even try to pretend that he wants to go in his own room. He follows Steve and as soon as the lights are off and they are both under the sheets, he curls up against Steve and he sighs like he’s trying to exhale all of the day’s worries.

“Thank you, for telling me. It must have been hard for you,” Steve whispers in the dark.

“How can you be real?” Is Bucky’s answer and Steve feels the way he smiles against his chest. It sends goosebumps all over his skin, even through his t-shirt.

“That’s what I’ve been asking myself since I found you.” Is what he says in reply.

Bucky kisses Steve’s chest through the fabric and suddenly the goosebumps turn into fire. He pulls Bucky closer and then presses a kiss to his head in return. Steve closes his eyes and just enjoys Bucky’s warmth. He thought at first it would be awkward to share a bed with someone after being by himself for so long, but it never is. Not with Bucky. It’s like they fit, two puzzle pieces finally coming together. 

Bucky speaks again, his voice soft and little like he is scared Steve might be asleep already, “Is this supposed to be so… _big_ what I feel? It’s like my chest wants to crack wide open whenever you’re near, whenever you touch me, it’s like flames on my skin… Is it supposed to be like this Steve?

Steve turns around, until they are face to face, both of their heads on Steve’s pillow, Bucky’s hair like a halo around them, “I don’t know, but I feel it too.”

-*-

Very early the next morning, Steve awakes suddenly, feeling the way Bucky just sprang out of the bed and is now looking by the bedroom window. The sky just started to color, the world around them barely waking up, but Bucky’s frame is rigid and he smells like fear. Steve almost feels like it’s the very first day all over again. 

“What is happening?” Steve says, out of bed too and standing next to Bucky, looking outside in the woods. He smells something different, something unknown and he fears that it might be Bucky's old pack. The smell is very faint like they are hiding it with something else or like they were here a very long time ago. 

“It’s them,” Bucky says. His knuckles are turning white from where he is holding hard onto the window frame. Steve can almost hear the wood crack under his hold. 

“Steve, you need to know something,” he adds, turning around to face him. He reaches for Steve’s waist and pulls him closer until their foreheads are touching. Steve instantly reaches out to touch too, to comfort, rubbing his hands up and down Bucky’s shaky frame.

“They didn’t throw me out. I ran away. I broke the bond myself because I was tired of what they were doing. To other people, to _me_. If they are after me, it’s because they are angry, Steve.”

Steve grabs at Bucky’s neck, a question in his eyes and as always, like he said, Bucky agrees to the hungry, demanding kiss he’s pulled into. It’s intense, it’s desperate, it’s all of the things Steve can’t put into words, that he pours into that kiss. 

“Then let them come, ‘cause I’ll never let you go.”

Bucky takes a deep breath and hugs Steve close to him. He takes another deep breath and when he looks back at Steve, his eyes are shining silver. Bucky is looking fierce and dangerous in a way Steve’s never seen before. He is used to a gentle Bucky, to a Bucky that has been hurt and was more shy and kept to himself.

This one, though, this Bucky looks ready for war. This Bucky sends a thrill of arousal down Steve’s spine because he looks so _hot_ . And Steve knows it’s not that time but, they will have to discuss this later, _oh yes they will_. 

“We have to wake up the others, and search the woods maybe?” Bucky says like he doesn’t know if he can tell Steve what to do, old habits die hard.

But Steve, he is out of the room and banging on Sam and Nat’s door before Bucky is even finished with his sentence. 

“Rise and shine! There are some enemies in the woods, it's time to turn into your wolves!”

Then they both go running down the stairs and they do the same on Clint’s door. Wanda is out of the basement before they even reach the door, her hair a mess around her sleepy face but she looks worried as she smells the air around. She reaches for Bucky and grabs at one of his hands and she squeezes it softly, he nods and wraps her into a hug, “I’m gonna be okay.”

They get out of the house and on the front porch in silence, all of them taking their clothes off and switching into their wolves. They enter the woods and start smelling and searching and looking for the intruders. The pact stays close to one another, Bucky never leaving Steve’s side. 

They spend the rest of the day outside exploring. Yes, there’s the remnants of a pack they don’t know of, it smells like something none of them ever smelt before. Steve knows it’s them, Bucky’s old pack because there’s a familiarity to what was on Bucky’s fur the night he found him.

They found nothing, though. They were there, but it looks like they left, so as the sun starts to set, they walk back home and they change back into their human form, exhausted and starving. Nat stays in her wolf and she stays on the front porch, looking straight into the woods.

“I think it’s best if one of us stays in his wolf at all times,” Sam says, walking towards Bucky and Steve, pulling his t-shirt over his head, “Our smell is more acute.”

“You’re right, can you bring her something to eat? She must be as hungry as all of us,” Steve replies and Sam nods in approval, squeezing his alpha’s shoulder as he walks past him. Steve turns around to see Bucky standing right next to Natasha, looking in the same direction as she does. He only pulls his sweatpants on, his chest is still bare, scars almost glowing in the low light of the evening. It’s like a map of everything that he is, Steve thinks.

He knows Bucky hates them, he often catches him in front of the mirror, looking at them, tracing them. Steve thinks they are beautiful. Steve thinks they are a reminder of how much of a fighter he is. Of course, he would prefer if Bucky didn’t go through all this violence. But those scars don’t make him less worthy of love, they don’t make him broken or messed up, they mean that he survived, and he’s still there.

He hugs him from behind, Bucky’s hands instantly going for Steve’s forearm. 

“Come inside to eat, you can take her place later if it makes you feel better.”

Steve knows enough of Bucky already to know that he won’t back out without a fight. That he is protective of them already and that he won’t let his last pack hurt any of them. It’s more than being Steve’s mate, he is part of this pack now, he loves and cares for all of them. 

Bucky gives a small pet to Natasha’s head and he smiles when she glares at him playfully. He follows Steve inside, with one last worried glance towards the forest. They sit inside and they all eat in silence. They still can smell the threat and they are all nervous about it, Steve can feel it. Under the table, he holds Bucky’s hand, his foot softly pressed against Sam’s bare ankle. Wanda’s head is resting on Sam’s shoulder as she’s chewing on her food, frowning down at her plate. Clint is on the other side of her and he is done eating, he is holding Wand’s hand, rubbing comforting circles into her hand.

Steve feels such an intense wave of love for his pack he gets almost choked up on it. His throat feels tight, his eyes burning with unshed tears. It’s not only proof that Bucky wasn't only meant to be his mate, but a part of this pack, of this family. And seeing them, all worried for him, and ready to fight for him. Steve never felt prouder.

Wanda and Sam start on the dishes, and Clint goes to his room. Steve and Bucky go back outside to Natasha, who’s still where they left her like she barely moved. 

“Come on, Nat, we’ll take over,” she huffs and she goes to the door, pushing it open with her head and as soon as she’s inside they hear the familiar _POP_ when she turns back human. They hear the pack talk inside, softly, carefully like they don’t want to disturb Steve and Bucky. Bucky takes his pants off again and he changes into his wolf, walking down the front steps and sitting in the middle of the driveway, facing the tall green trees. 

Steve joins him, but he stays human. He sits next to them and he rests his head against Bucky’s soft fur. He loves the way it looks under the moonlight, shining like a million stars. It looks as soft as it feels, it looks as good as Bucky’s hair does. He talks about random things, knowing full well Bucky can’t answer but it’s a distraction.

Because Steve, even as the alpha, even as the leader, is terrified. He’s ready to fight. Hell, he’s ready to die for Bucky. But he’s scared. Scared that his pack will get hurt. Scared of this stranger’s pack who did so many bad things to the love of his life, to innocent people as well. 

It feels like they’ve been here for a few hours, the crickets are singing and Steve is listening to the steady sound of Bucky’s breathing in and out. He is about to fall asleep, face first in the soft fur of Bucky’s side when he feels him tense under him. He stands up quickly, Steve almost falls face first in the dirt, and Bucky’s ears prick up, listening. 

Bucky whines, low in his throat, and Steve’s heart breaks all over again, like that very first night. It’s the same sound, the same distress.

He hears the front door bang open and suddenly, all of the pack is behind them. There’s the sound of branches cracking as someone is getting closer to the house. No, it’s not someone, there’s more than one person. It smells like man, it smells like wolf. It smells like strangers, like danger. 

Steve hears Sam and Nat changing into their wolves. He feels the way Wanda and Clint are hesitating, probably smelling the humans as well. He looks back into the woods, between the dark forms of the trees and he sees it: pairs of shining eyes getting closer and closer. Bucky moves in front of Steve and starts growling at the woods. Sam and Nat join him.

Then, there’s a human form emerging from the woods. He’s a man, with grey hair, wrinkles around his eyes. But Steve can’t tell his age. He’s standing tall, he still looks strong, he looks ageless. Around him there are wolves, Steve can see five of them but he doesn't know yet if there’s more hiding in the woods behind them.

There’s a proud kind of smile on the man’s face and Steve instantly wants to punch him.

They all stop a few feet apart, the man gesturing for his hoard of wolves to stay behind him. He is wearing dress pants and a button-down shirt, sleeves rolled up. _Who dresses like that to walk into the woods?_ Steve thinks. 

Clearly someone who lets his pack do all the dirty work. Steve despises him even more. You should respect your pack, take care of them, not treat them as your slaves. He is vibrating with the need to just change right here, and jump on this man. But apparently, since the man is up and on his two feet, he wants to discuss. Alpha to alpha. So Steve stays human too, filled with rage and anger.

“I see you found something of mine,” the man finally says, voice dripping with a confidence that Steve _loathes_.

But before he even has time to answer, Bucky is the one jumping for the man’s throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * peaks * PLEASE DON'T HATE ME TOO MUCH!!!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Who are you?” Steve finally asks, stepping in closer and looking down at Bucky’s previous alpha. At the man who took the love of his life, and managed to break him into pieces.
> 
> He looks up at Steve, smirking at him and Steve wants to kick that smile off of his face so bad. 
> 
> “My name is Alexander Pierce, and James, here, is from my pack.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to JJK because she helped me SO,SO,SOOOOO much for the fight scene and if it wasn't for her, that chapter wouldn't be up today. Thank you to everyone who helped me through this, who encouraged me, who were excited by each update. That's the reason this fic is where it is today. Thanks to Lenne, for offering to collab with me and for the beautiful art she provided for this story. 
> 
> There's a little playlist I made for this story, in case you're interested : https://open.spotify.com/playlist/54D0q1qwRSwmvSFTYd94a8?si=cncZSeO7ROmo1cEzX3vqSQ

"Bucky, Stop!" Steve screams as Bucky collides with the older man, pushing him over on his back in the tall grass. Bucky growls in the man's face, big black paws on his chest, claws out but not getting into flesh yet. His mouth is close to the other man's neck but he stops instantly at Steve's order.

Steve sees a tiny bit of fear in the man's eyes at that. He sees realization, confusion, and it sends a thrill of satisfaction down Steve's spine. _That's right, Bucky's mine now._ The man doesn’t fight or try to push Bucky away from him, even if he could. He must be suffocating under the heavy weight pressed on his chest, his face turns a bit pink but he stays put, looking infuriatingly calm. 

“Who are you?” Steve finally asks, stepping in closer and looking down at Bucky’s previous alpha. At the man who took the love of his life, and managed to break him into pieces.

He looks up at Steve, smirking at him and Steve wants to kick that smile off of his face so bad. 

“My name is Alexander Pierce, and James, here, is from my pack.”

Bucky growls at that, and this time, Steve sees the way his claws break skin. How they scratch at the man’s chest through his shirt, blood seeping through the fabric. It makes Pierce hiss in pain and he snaps his fingers once. The wolves who were standing behind get dangerously closer, growling back at Steve and Bucky. Steve, in turn, doesn’t have to do anything to call his pack; they instantly surround them, Natasha even snaps her teeth at one white wolf with crazy eyes. 

He looks at them, and they are outnumbered, Pierce’s pack is way bigger than his own. He senses even more wolves still hidden in the woods. 

“If you’re here to fight, you better change yourself and join, ‘cause I won’t stand here and have you watch your pack being torned apart.” Steve warns.

“Steve, that’s nonsense. I don’t want to fight, I just want you to give me what belongs to me.”

Steve shakes his head, surprised at how this complete stranger knows his name. He feels rage flowing through his blood at the way Pierce’s talk about Bucky. He doesn’t belong to him, not anymore. He never did, he was always meant to be Steve’s pack. He was always meant to find his way to Steve.

“Bucky, step back,” Steve says, using his alpha voice. Bucky instantly steps away from Pierce, backing right into Steve’s side and pressing against his thigh. Steve loves the way Pierce looks at the scene with complete disbelief in his eyes. For the first time since he arrived, the mask falls, and he doesn’t hide the way he feels. He is angry. 

“His name is _James_ and he is my mate.” 

Steve shakes his head, smiling down at the man who’s still sitting on the ground, his shirt getting bloodier by the minute because of Bucky’s claws. He buries his hand deep down in Bucky’s fur and he pets him tenderly, eyes never leaving Pierce’s. 

“His name is Bucky, and you’re wrong. He is _my_ mate. He was always meant to be mine.”

Pierce stands up again, brushing the dirt from his fancy dress pants, grimacing at the way the wounds on his chest are still bleeding and ruining his shirt. He walks a few steps closer to Steve and Bucky and he tries to smile again, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. It just looks fake, like the rest of him. 

“Aw, you really think so?”

“I know so.” Steve spits in his face. 

“That’s cute Steve, really, picking up strays, I see,” he says, gesturing to the rest of Steve’s pack. His family. His whole heart and soul. Pierce points at them with pity in his eyes and Steve wants to rip this man’s head off for insulting them. 

Steve’s pack feels his distress instantly because they get closer again, surrounding Pierce and his wolves in a way that makes it impossible for them to move.

“You’re aware of how broken he is, right?” Pierce says, pointing his chin at Bucky. “You don’t want that in your pack, Steve. He’s unstable.”

Bucky starts to shake against Steve. He feels him press closer against his leg, he hears him whine, low in his throat, and senses violence in Bucky’s thoughts; a longing to rend Pierce limb for limb, desire to revenge, and under it all the trace of fear of having to go back. It all shakes from Bucky with a low growl Pierce snickers at the sound, looking down at Bucky, shaking his head. 

“You better give him back to me, I’ll take him off your hands, Steve.”

Steve only tightens his hold on Bucky’s fur, trying to make him understand he would never let him go back to this asshole. He tries to send waves of what he feels, he tries to reassure him. _You’re mine Bucky. I won’t ever let you go._

“You know what is going to happen, _Alexander_ ,” Steve says, spitting his name like it’s a disgusting word. He is tired of hearing his own name in the other man’s syrupy voice.

“You’re going to fucking turn into your wolf, you’re going to stop being a goddamn coward, and you’re going to fight us. Bucky is part of my pack. Bucky is my mate. He was never yours. So you either change and fight or you turn your back away and you leave. And you better never come back here.”

Pierce clicks his tongue in annoyance, looking around at his wolves and himself being surrounded by Steve’s pack. He sighs and puts his hand on his waist like he’s thinking about it. 

“Steve, come on. There’s no need for violence. Clearly, you’re right. James is your mate. He is part of your family now. We’ll just leave.”

He snaps his fingers again and his pack backs down instantly. They look reluctant to do so, but they do back down and stop growling at Steve’s gang. Pierce’s nods at them, and then turns his back and starts making his way back in the woods, walking slowly with his hands folded behind his back. The wolves, one by one start following. Steve doesn’t believe for one second that they could have won that easily. He watches them go, body rigid and ready to change at the first sign of them coming back. 

Steve’s gut twists because he doesn’t trust this man at all, and sure enough,when they reach the line of the trees, where the forest gets deeper and deeper, Pierce turns around. He snaps his fingers a second time and Steve’s stomach drops at the sight of the wolves prowling back towards them. 

If he wants war, he is going to have a war.

  
  


-*-

  
  


Pierce’s pack starts howling, the sound of it raising through the woods, seeping through the tall trees and sending chills down Steve’s spine. They start walking back slowly back to them, howling and growling as Pierce slowly removes his clothes, ready to finally shift into his wolf form and to fight properly.

Steve does the same, gesturing for his pack not to move yet, _let them come_ , he thinks. If we fight, we fight on our ground. 

The sky is dark above them. Thick clouds hiding the stars and moon. There’s only a faint light coming from the house, bathing his pack in soft gold. Steve swallows passed the lump in his throat and he throws the last of his clothes away before bending over and turning in his wolf form just at the same time as Pierce does. Steve walks in front of his pack, while Pierce stays behind.

He thinks it reflects perfectly the kind of alphas they both are. How different they lead.

Bucky stays close to him, dark fur pressed against his own golden coat. They walk next to each other and they zero in on Pierce while the rest of Steve’s pack fans out behind them, bearing down on Pierce’s wolves. The packs size each other up, keeping their distance, snapping sharp teeth and growling to intimidate. Steve can practically taste the tension and adrenaline in the air as each side prepares to attack. They’re outnumbered, almost three to one, but Steve believes in them, trusts them. He knows that even if they are outnumbered, it doesn’t mean they’re weaker. 

_Now!_ Steve shouts the order wordlessly to his pack and they launch into an attack, a whirling mass of teeth and claws, tearing through Pierce’s wolves like a hurricane through a forest. Steve growls with pride as he and Bucky pick up their pace and bound towards Pierce. 

He knows his family is a bunch of fighters, he knows they are strong and they can win. What he's worried about is Pierce.The man is unpredictable. He plays dirty and Steve is scared that he might hurt Bucky even more. He’s scared Pierce might let his pack attack while he sneaks away from behind. Steve doesn’t know the man, but Bucky does. Bucky makes a beeline for Pierce, leading the charge and pressing between Pierce’s pack. They crowd up against him, trying to block his path with bared teeth and vicious swipes of their claws, but Bucky battles through, and as soon as Steve’s pack understands that he’s going straight for the alpha, they start helping him, they clear the way. Natasha clamps her strong jaw around the white wolf’s neck, and rips a howl from him which echoes through the night. 

Steve jumps at another’s throat and wrestles it to the side, Sam claws at two more, sending them careening back and pushing others out of the way, whilst Wanda and Clint fight to keep them at bay. Quick enough, working as a seamless team, guiding each other with thoughts and feelings, watching out for each other’s backs, they open up a path for Bucky to reach Pierce. 

Bucky strikes him in the face with his left paw, the one that’s still scarred by what his former ‘pack’ did to him. Claws slash through Pierce’s skin and his grey fur instantly turns red with his blood flowing from his muzzle. He snaps his teeth at Bucky, but Bucky twists out of the way to avoid them, and dives for Pierce’s back paws instead. Pierce is clearly out of practise, used to letting his pack do all the fighting for them, and Bucky bites down on Pierce’s hind legs with a ferocious chomp that’s all teeth and snarls. Pierce growls in pain and kicks back, connecting his paw with Bucky’s eye and forcing him to release his hold.

Steve senses Bucky’s pain and shakes off a black wolf he’s fighting to launch to Bucky’s aid, but anger flares through their bond and Steve understands what is happening; Bucky wants to take care of Pierce himself. He wants to take revenge for all the things Pierce put him through. Steve makes his way to them, but hangs back, covering Bucky, keeping the rest of Pierce’s wolves back, but leaving Pierce to Bucky. Steve scans the battleground as he pads around the perimeter of Bucky’s fight, lashing out at any other wolves that dare to get too close. He sees some of Pierce’s wolves already on the ground, their fur bloody and their wounds fatal, and he watches as his pack tears the rest of them apart. They may be outnumbered, but they are stronger. Pierce wolves don’t fight with any coherence, there is no teamwork in their attacks, and as the fight wears on, they look edgy and wary. It’s like Pierce’s pack doesn’t know what to do without him controlling them and telling them what to do; and with Pierce busy fighting back against Bucky, he isn’t paying attention to them. 

Sam circles a dark brown wolf, clearly having the upper hand on him. Steve sees two wolves, deeply wounded, walking back towards the woods, cowering away. There’s no need to run for them, they are covered in blood and cuts; they won’t go far. If they’re not ready to keep fighting for their alpha, Steve thinks they are better off anyway. 

Steve hears Pierce give another pained yelp and turns to see Bucky has the alpha pinned, his teeth are bared and snarling down above Pierce’s throat. Steve’s instinct is to jump to help, but he knows this is something Bucky has to do for himself. He pads close, making sure there’s no way Pierce can wriggle from his retribution. Fear emanates from the cowed alpha, and Bucky doesn’t waste another moment, tearing at Pierce’s juglar with a vicious snarl. Hot blood sprays, but Bucky doesn’t stop ripping and tearing, making _sure_ Pierce is dead, even when the alpha stops writhing beneath him. Bucky’s snout drips with blood, fur matted, eyes wide.

Pierce’s pack must sense his death, because they give a collective mourning howl and all at once, the fighting stops. They linger, for half a moment, clearly shocked, before they high-tail and flee into the woods. Sam and Natasha immediately try to give chase, but Steve calls them back. There’s no need to go after them, he knows their threat is over. 

He feels the exhaustion coming from his pack. He feels his very own tiredness in his bones. Clint and Wanda are walking closer, pressing at his sides and licking at a few of his wounds. Steve licks them back, showing them he is alright, checking for their own injuries. When he is sure everyone looks fine, he walks to Bucky, who has fallen on his side next to Pierce’s unmoving form. 

Bucky lets out a howl and it chills Steve to his very core,because even if he went through hell and back under Pierce’s power, they were still bonded; there still was a deep connection through them. Even if he is Steve’s mate now, even if he’s part of Steve’s pack, his past will never be completely erased. Steve knows that it still hurts Bucky to do what he did, even if in the end, it was what he needed to do.

Steve lays down beside him, pressing close and they start to lick each other's wounds. Steve’s heart squeezes painfully at what he feels from his mate. He feels shame and pain, he still feels anger, and so much tiredness. He pushes a little at Bucky, Steve not feeling comfortable resting so close from Pierce’s dead body. Bucky gets up on very shaky legs, still bleeding. The rest of the pack surrounds them, sending waves of love and gratitude to Bucky and helping him walk back to the house. They all make their way to the barn, far too exhausted to turn back human; it would be too much of a painful experience.

They fall into a pile of big wolves in the center of the barn, Bucky and Steve in the middle of it, cuddling close, muzzles pressed together as if they were kissing. Natasha stays by the door for a little while, like she’s scared the other wolves might come back, but eventually she joins the pile and they all fall into a much deserved sleep as the deep sky above them starts to clear up and stars finally show their light. 

-*-

It is well into the next day that Steve finally wakes up. Just like a few weeks ago, he and Bucky are alone, and human. Arms are wrapped around torsos and legs are tangled with each other. Bucky’s face is pressed against the middle of Steve’s chest, hair and stubble tickling his dirty skin. They are covered in cuts and sweat and dirt, but they are alive, they are still together. Steve pulls him closer, on the verge of tears, suddenly overwhelmed with gratitude now that the adrenaline has calmed down. He sees flashes of last night, of blood and claws and he almost hears the painful howls of those hurt wolves in the distance. 

Steve feels the way Bucky takes in a shaky breath as he wakes up too. He feels the way Bucky’s lashes are fluttering against his skin, feels the way Bucky’s body goes rigid, almost like he wants to pull away. Steve doesn’t let him. He cradles the back of Bucky’s head with one of his hands and presses a kiss into his tangled hair, “You’re okay, I got you.”

It feels like the first day all over again, Bucky’s body is shaking against his own, Bucky’s hands holding onto Steve’s back almost painfully as he tries to take steadying breaths. He feels like he is about to break down so Steve does what he can and just holds him close. He runs his big hands up and down Bucky’s back and shoulders, speaking reassuring words in this ear.

They stay like that until the trembles finally subside and Steve suggests they go inside for a well deserved shower. Bucky doesn’t speak, like he knows that as soon as he opens his mouth he will burst into tears. He nods and he lets Steve help him up on his feet. Both of them are feeling a bit unsteady, muscles and bones still sore from the night before. Steve takes some time to inspect all of Bucky’s naked form, seeing if all his cuts are healing properly, making sure there aren't some wounds that could deserve some special care.

He looks alright. On the outside. But Bucky won’t meet Steve’s eyes, looking down at the ground, at their feet. Like he’s avoiding him. Like Bucky is ashamed. Steve tries not to read too much into it, at least, regarding their own relationship. He feels shaken up himself and knows how hard last night was on Bucky, not only physically but emotionally. It isn’t an easy task to kill a member of a former pack, even harder when the wolf you tore apart was calling himself your alpha for years. 

Steve grabs at Bucky’s hand, intertwining their fingers together, and Bucky instantly presses closer, following him to the house and up the stairs. They get in Steve’s bathroom, and he knows, he hears, that the rest of the pack is slowly waking up. He also knows them well enough to be sure they will let Bucky and him have their own space for a while. 

Steve reaches for the shower and turns the water to its hottest. He grabs fluffy towels for them too, an extra one for Bucky’s hair. Steve turns around and sees his lover standing there in the middle of the room, wringing his hands, looking down at his feet like he wants to be smaller, like he wants to disappear. He is breathing shakily again, fast and unsteady and Steve closes the distance between them and reaches out carefully, 

“Can I touch you?”

Bucky only nods and easily lets himself be folded up in Steve’s strong arms. Steve walks them backward until they reach the edge of the shower and steps under the spray. They both instantly relax a notch as the hot water runs down their wounded skin. Steve grabs at the shower gel bottle on the shelf and laters it into his hands, Bucky is still pressed against his front. He starts washing Bucky’s back, massaging the sore muscles of his shoulders and going down, down, until he reaches the dimples above his ass. He feels shy all of sudden, realizing it’s the very first time they have showered together. Steve’s hand goes up against Bucky’s back again, and he takes a tiny step back, letting Steve wash his front too. Steve is careful with Bucky’s left arm, being incredibly tender with the scarred limb. 

Steve then kneels on the hard shower tiles, wincing a little as he does, his own body is still hurting everywhere. He soaps up Bucky’s strong legs from his feet to his thick, muscular thighs. He is on eye level with Bucky’s cock and although he is too tired to feel any kind of arousal, both of them are, he still enjoys the tenderness of the moment. Steve still acknowledges that Bucky is beautiful everywhere, from head to toe, every part of him makes Steve’s blood sing. 

Steve looks up, his hands hovering in Bucky's most intimate area. He doesn’t want to cross boundaries, especially not after such a rough moment for Bucky. Especially after he was reminded of all the atrocities he went through. Bucky reaches down and cups Steve’s face and nods, his eyes shining with something like fondness for the first time since they woke up. Steve takes care of Bucky’s cock and ass and washes every part of him, softly, tenderly, scared of hurting him in any way. He goes back on his feet shakily and Bucky’s arms instantly wrap around his waist again. Steve drops a few kisses on the side of his face, murmuring, “Come on babe, turn around, I gotta wash your hair too.”

Bucky does turn around, his back against Steve’s front, the water raining down on the both of them. Steve grabs at the shampoo and starts rubbing it into Bucky’s long hair. He massages his scalp, scratching his nails at some places. His goal is to make Bucky relax, but he feels him quickly start to shake all over again. He goes quicker than he first intended too, and after he rinses the conditioner, Bucky quickly turns around, hugging Steve around the middle and he pushes his face into Steve’s neck and finally breaks down in tears. Bucky’s body is wracked with sobs and it’s like all of the pent up stress, anger and fear is finally released from him. Steve knows it’s relief, knows that Bucky is overwhelmed by the fact that all of those years of abuse are finally over. Bucky cries over his newly found freedom. Bucky cries as he finally says goodbye to the person he was before. And Steve holds him through it all. Steve would hold him in the middle of a house in flames if that was what Bucky needed. 

Bucky cries until the water turns lukewarm. Steve still feels a bit filthy and tired but he holds him anyway. When the tears stop, Bucky looks up at him with bloodshot eyes and presses a single, chaste kiss on Steve’s mouth. Steve kisses back just as softly and murmurs “I love you,” against Bucky’s pretty lips. Steve feels him nod frantically, feels him swallow roughly like he’s about to cry again. He doesn’t say it back, but Steve doesn’t care. He feels it anyway. He knows.

“Come on, go wait for me in my bed, I’ll wash myself and join you.”

Bucky kisses Steve again and steps out of the shower. Steve watches him rubbing the fluffy towel over his body through the fogged glass of the shower. He washes himself quickly, rubbing at his sore skin and almost healed wounds whilst Bucky wraps the smaller towel on his head like the girls usually do and it makes Steve smile. Bucky then makes his way out of the bathroom and into Steve’s room and Steve starts washing his own hair. Quickly enough he is out too and rubbing himself dry. He stops by the sink to brush his teeth. It’s almost like he still has the taste of blood on his tongue. 

When Steve walks into his room, Bucky has hung the towels on the knob of Steve’s closet door and he is curled on top of Steve’s bed, completely naked, his wet hair is cascading over the pillows. There are still red marks on his back and legs but just like Steve, he healed quickly enough and they will both be alright. Steve slips in behind him, spooning him, strong arms around Bucky’s torso and pulling him closer. As soon as they are joined into bed, they are asleep again, dreaming of the better days ahead. 

-*-

They sleep the rest of the day away. Barely moving from their initial position, both of them completely spent and exhausted. Steve feels like all they’ve done is sleep since the dreadful night, but they needed it. A normal full moon is very draining but after a fight like the one they went through, it’s going to take them the whole week to be back in full shape.

Steve is woken up by hunger first, not because he is fully well rested yet. He slips out of bed trying his best not to shake Bucky out of his own sleep. His lover only rolls around and pulls Steve’s pillow against his chest, burying his face into it. Steve smiles at the sight of it, smile only widening as Bucky starts snoring again.

He goes downstairs quietly, and sees that Sam and Natasha are cuddling on the big couch in the living room, the TV’s volume on low not to disturb the rest of the house. Steve walks behind them and grasps strongly at Sam’s shoulder, leans down to drop a kiss on Natasha’s hair. Steve then makes his way to the kitchen and opens up the fridge and grabs things to make himself a sandwich. He smiles as he sees Sam walking in, leaning against the counter and watching him quietly. Steve feels Sam’s eyes on him as he works, and he knows what his friend is doing. He is assessing, analyzing, looking for bruises or unhealed cuts. He’s looking for wounds from deep within as well. Sam is always being the best at reading their feelings. 

He waits for Steve to sit down next to him at the kitchen island to start talking. 

“Is he okay?”

Steve gives a small smile at that, because it’s obvious to Sam, to all of them really, that Bucky is one of Steve’s top priority now. 

“He’s pretty shaken up. Physically he’s okay, he seems all healed up, just like me. We showered together when we got back.” Steve hates that he blushes at that, also hates the way Sam is smiling at him teasingly. 

“But it’s pretty rough, Steve, to kill a member of your pack, even an older one. He’s gonna be pretty out of it for a few days at least. We will have to be there even more than we already have. We will need to show him that he belongs here with us, that he is not alone.”

Steve knew that. Natasha was in a similar situation before they met her. The bond, even when broken, stays in you for a little while. It’s like an open wound. It takes time to heal, and it leaves a scar. Steve knows he is not going anywhere, himself. Even if it takes months for Bucky to be better, he will be there waiting for him. This is it, for Steve. This is Bucky as his mate, his lover. With Sam, Natasha, Clint and Wanda as his pack and family. He wants to grow old, surrounded by all of them. That’s where his happiness is, right under this roof.

Sam waits for Steve to be done with his sandwich before getting closer and he pulls him in a big, warm hug. Steve relaxes against him instantly and hugs back, squeezing his brother and friend tightly around the middle. It feels like home, hugging any of them, it’s a reminder every single time of the bond between them, “Thank you, Sam.”

“I’m glad we’re all okay.”

“Yeah, me too.”

Sam releases him with one last squeeze and goes back to the living room to Natasha. Steve makes a second sandwich that he puts on Bucky’s favorite plate and puts some plastic wrap around it for when Bucky wakes up later. After that he downs a tall glass of water and fills one up for Bucky as well. He walks to the basement door and hears a bit of music, signaling that Wanda is awake and well, but when he walks by Clint’s door, he snorts when he hears big loud snores coming from the other side of the door. Steve makes his way back upstairs and slips back into bed with his lover after putting down the tall glass of water on Bucky’s side table. 

-*-

When Steve wakes again, it’s the next morning and the bed is cold under his fingers. It smells like his shampoo and soap, it smells earthy and warm, just like Bucky. The pillow is still a bit damp because of Bucky going to bed with his hair still wet from their shower. Steve relives it, now that he is well rested and calm. He sees behind his closed lids, still feels under his fingertips, the miles of beautiful golden skin. It wasn’t smooth everywhere, there were scars scattered all over Bucky’s body like a constellation of what he went through. Still, he was the most beautiful thing for Steve. 

He hears voices rising from the kitchen so he pulls himself out of bed and goes to meet them. All of his pack is reunited around the island, eating breakfast together. He smiles at the scene, Wanda sitting on the counter with her legs dangling from it, speaking to Natasha who’s sitting on one of the stools. Sam and Clint are arguing over how to cook the eggs properly and Bucky is looking at the whole scene with a fond smile on his lips. He looks up when he feels Steve coming in, but he quickly looks down into his coffee, smile turning down into a frown.

Steve walks to him and drops a lingering kiss on top of his messy hair, wavy and full of tangles from sleeping on it without combing through it first. He smells good and Steve smiles against the dark strands. Bucky leans closer to him, but he never looks up, he doesn’t meet Steve’s eyes. Sam distracts him by asking how Steve wants his bacon and eggs, but he will get back to that. There is no way Bucky will avoid him like he did a few weeks ago. They are past that. They are together now.

Bucky doesn’t shy away from Steve’s touch but he is still a bit colder than usual. They all sit together to eat and they talk and they laugh and it’s obvious that they are all so grateful of being together after what happened. The pack is still whole, they are still a family. Steve offers to wash the dishes and Bucky quickly disappears down to the basement with Wanda and Nat. Steve lets them go but he is still a bit worried as he scrubs the plates and the pans. He almost slices his thumb open with a knife when he reaches for it in the soapy water because he is too distracted.

Bucky stays away all day and it breaks Steve’s poor heart in half. He knows what Sam told him, that it could be a rough few days for Bucky. But Sam also told Steve to stay close to him, to take care of Bucky and make him feel loved. What is he supposed to do, now that Bucky is avoiding him again? What an alpha he makes, moping over his damn feelings instead of walking to Bucky and asking him what’s the matter. The day goes on like that, with Steve miserable and Bucky God knows where… It’s just before Steve is ready for bed, that he sees him with Clint. They are sitting together on the little platform on the roof looking at the stars through Clint’s old telescope.

Steve grabs his sketchbook and a pencil and goes to bed, hoping that Bucky will join him soon. He draws without really thinking about it, his pencil runs freely over the thick sheet of paper filling it with what is going through his mind. There’s the shape of a pair lips coming to life, some bright eyes circled with long, thick eye lashes. Strong shoulders sprinkled with scars and freckles…

When Steve finally hears the sounds of footsteps on the roof, and then quickly enough coming back inside the house, his heart speeds up a little. He knows he has to talk to Bucky soon, he doesn’t want the distance to grow between them. He doesn’t want to go back to before. He can’t go back to those days where he didn’t know the taste of Bucky’s lips or the feel of his skin. Steve can’t ever forget how silky and soft Bucky’s hair is when it’s running through his eager fingers. 

There are tears burning in Steve’s eyes when he hears Bucky stop in front of the door, and instead walking back to what was initially his room. Steve waits, holding his breath, but soon enough there is the sound of Bucky slipping under the sheets. Sheets that are not the ones of their shared bed. Steve turns out the light and drops his sketchbook on the floor, turning his back to the door and he lets the tears fall down freely. Steve never knew you could love someone so strongly, so unapologetically, that just the thought of being away from them could make your heart hurt. 

Steve stares at the wall for what feels like hours, reciting in his head what he is going to tell Bucky in the morning. That he can go if he wants to. Steve loves him enough for that. Maybe all he needed them for was to kill Pierce and now that it’s done, he’s trying to find a way to leave. No, it’s impossible. Steve feels the love coming out of Bucky in waves. Whenever they are close, whenever they touch. It’s there and it’s strong, and their hearts are singing together. Even that morning at breakfast, Steve felt shame and fear but there was so much love too. Maybe it’s like Bucky said before, maybe he still thinks he is not good enough for Steve.

He remembers Bucky’s words “ _What if I go feral again_?” and then he sees the way Bucky attacked Pierce, like there wasn’t anything else he wanted more than to spill his blood. Is he ashamed of that? That Steve saw this side of him?

His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of Bucky getting up again. Steve stays still and listens closely, hoping that maybe he is finally joining him in bed. He hears the careful footsteps of his lover as he walks past Steve’s door and makes his way down the stairs. Then, Steve hears the door of the refrigerator open, and Bucky footsteps making their way outside. Steve still feels him near, Bucky must be sitting on the front porch, eating his late night snack. Steve can’t help himself any longer, he quickly gets out of bed and walks to Bucky’s room where he falls in the middle of his bed. The sheets are still warm from his body. Steve grabs at Bucky’s pillow and breathes him in, it’s a matter of seconds before he falls back asleep holding it against his chest like it’s his mate’s body.

-*-

Steve doesn’t know how long he slept but he wakes up to Bucky’s weight dipping the mattress next to him. His body is still cold from the night breeze and he smells like the woods. Steve rolls around to face him, and Bucky’s back is resting against the headboard, his body a careful distance from Steve. Bucky looks down at him and he sighs, “What are you doing here Steve?”

Steve reaches over and pokes Bucky’s hand with his finger. He does it a few times, until Bucky’s fist finally unfolds. Steve slips his own hand under it, enjoying the softness of Bucky’s skin. With his thumb, Steve presses softly against Bucky’s pulse point and follows the steady beat of it. He breathes in and out a few times before finally looking back up at Bucky, “You’ve been avoiding me again.”

Bucky nods a few times, Steve feels it even through the darkness of the room. 

“Do you need some space? Do you… Do you want to go?”

“Oh, Steve,'' Bucky says on an exhale and slips down further onto the bed until he’s lying next to Steve at eye level. It’s like he understands finally, how scared Steve has been all day. It’s like he never thought Steve could be terrified of losing him. He sees it in Bucky’s eyes, the surprise, the regret. Bucky scoots a bit closer until their bodies are completely aligned and he presses his forehead against Steve, “I don’t want to leave.”

“I don’t like it, when you push me away,” Steve says carefully. He whispers the words like they are precious, like they are to be a secret only between the two of them. “But, if sometimes that’s what you need, for me to leave you alone, then I will.”

Bucky’s eyes are set on Steve’s, like he’s looking for something, like he’s searching for his own words in their shade of blue. He’s scrutinizing Steve’s face like he’s waiting for him to take back those words, like he’s waiting for Steve to tell him it’s all a joke. Steve kisses his left cheek, then his right. He stretches his neck and leaves a final kiss against his forehead, “Why are you looking at me like you don’t believe me?”

Bucky lifts one of his hands and he starts tracing Steve’s features. The shape of his jaw, the slope of his nose, a bit crooked in the middle. He touches Steve’s chin, the fullness of his lips. He traces reverently around Steve’s eyes, making his long lashes flutter against Bucky’s warm fingertips, “There really aren't any other alphas like you.”

Bucky kisses his lips then, softly, tenderly, like it’s the first time, like he wants to really remember this moment. He pulls away after that, but only to press his face against Steve’s chest, to wrap his arms around Steve’s waist. It’s silent for a few moments around them, just the wind and the song of the cicadas coming from the open window. Steve lets his hand run up and down Bucky’s back, feeling like he’s ready to fall back asleep when Bucky speaks.

“I hate that you saw me like that. I hate that you heard the horrible things he said about me. I’m scared you might think little of me now that you know how he was. That you saw me tear his throat apart. I felt, for a moment, like I was going back to who I was before I'd met you.”

“Bucky, we are werewolves, we’ve all seen some horrible shit. We’ve all done stuff we’re not proud of. There is literally nothing you can do that will make me push you away or will make me see you differently.”

“Why are you so good to me?”

“Because someone ought to be!” Steve says. “You are one of the bravest people I've ever met. You have the sweetest soul, you are kind, and you are beautiful. The things he said to you, because I know he did tell you the worst lies about yourself, they are not true! He pushed them inside that thick skull of yours until you believed them. They were _lies_ , Bucky. The truth is what I’ve seen in front of me since we’ve met. The truth is that I love you, completely. Every facet of who you are, I love it all. And nothing will make me stop loving you, do you get that?”

“We will have to work on that a little bit okay? Me, believing the good things,” Bucky asks, his voice a bit choked up by Steve's spontaneous speech.

“Of course, sweetheart, of course. I’ll tell you every day how wonderful you are, okay?”

Bucky chuckles at that, the sound of his laugh a bit wet with tears, but he nods and goes back to cuddling Steve’s chest. _They will be okay_ , Steve thinks. They need to talk it out when they hit a bump in the road, and everything will be fine. He will be there for Bucky, just like Sam said, he will listen to him, and he will be there for him. Steve will remind him everyday of his place in this house, in this pack, in his heart, until Bucky believes it, until there’s isn’t any doubts in his head. 

-*-

Bucky is in the kitchen the next day, making pancakes and bacon for everyone. He remembers the way they all take their coffee and fixes a cup for all of them. When Steve walks in, Bucky turns from the stove and hugs Steve close to him, squeezing him around the middle and thanking him for the night before. Steve pushes a few strands of hair behind Bucky’s ear and kisses his cheek tenderly, “Any time, sweetheart.”

They all sit around the table, sharing sleepy smiles. “This is delicious, Bucky,” Wanda tells him, squeezing at his good arm from where she’s sitting to his right. They talk about random things for a little while, Steve’s hand resting under the table on top of Bucky’s thigh. Natasha and Clint are arguing over something and it just makes Sam smile at the both of them, he’s more than used to their friendly banter. Wanda is talking softly to Bucky about this new wool she found in town, asking him if he would like mittens. Steve falls in love all over again with Bucky’s smile and bright eyes as he tells Wanda he would love to.

Steve looks around, and sees that pretty much everyone’s plate is empty by now, that they are all chatting and sipping the last drop of their coffees, so he decides it is time to talk. He clears his throat and with one last reassuring squeeze around Bucky’s thigh, he brings both of his hands on top of the table. “Guys, I think it is more than time to address something.” They all fall silent at that, turning their heads and attention towards their alpha. Natasha smiles at him, reaching for Sam’s hand and she gives Steve an encouraging nod, already knowing what he is about to say.

“I know that, by now, with the way you’re treating him, that you consider Bucky part of this pack. He is one of ours now, and you proved that all to me when we were threatened earlier this week. When his life was in danger, you were all there for him, you fought for him. So, what I am trying to tell you is that, from now on, Bucky is officially a member of this family. He is also my mate, as you probably all guessed already.”

Steve smiles then as a few laughs rise around the breakfast table. He looks at them, at their bright eyes and their happy faces and then Steve turns around to see that Bucky has gone completely still beside him, looking like a dear caught in the headlights. He looks like he’s torn between laughing and crying as his eyes go from every single member of the pack like he’s waiting for them to say they disagree with Steve. None of them do, of course they don’t, because what Steve said was just formalities, they all knew already Bucky was pack now. They all knew already how much he meant to Steve and that he was there to stay. Finally, Bucky’s eyes find Steve and there’s so much emotion in them, it’s the easiest thing for Steve to just lean down and catch Bucky’s lips with his own, the kiss quickly turns into a smiley one as their family starts wolf whistling at them. Pun intended. 

As they start cleaning up the table, all of the members of the pack walk to Bucky and give him a big hug, long lasting ones where they just breath each other in because they are brothers and sisters now. They are pack and it’s important. Bucky never stops smiling the whole time he is being hugged. He thanks all of them when they let him ago, he makes sure to tell them how grateful he is. The others start cleaning up, pushing Steve and Bucky away from the kitchen with knowing smiles. They go back to their rooms to make their beds and change out of their pajamas, and as Bucky is stretching up the blankets from the bed in his room where they slept last night, Steve looks at him, shoulder resting against the door frame. 

“You could help me you know. Alphas don’t make their beds?”

“Would you move into my room? Permanently? I don’t want to spend another night sleeping away from you.”

Bucky sighs and flops into his half made bed, hiding his blushing face with his arm, “I swear to God, you know what to say to make me go all fluttery inside,” he says gesturing above his stomach with his free hand, “It’s like stupid butterflies like in those romance novels, like seriously, Steve, what the fuck?”

It makes Steve laugh and he jumps in the bed next to Bucky, pulling at his arm until his face is free from it, “Is that a yes?”

“Of course it’s a yes! How could I say no to those damn puppy eyes,” Bucky says with a laugh.

“I’ll let you know I’m a big bad alpha, not a puppy!” Steve replies, like he is actually offended but he can’t keep the act up for very long and kisses Bucky again. Steve holds his lover’s face with his hand cupping at his cheek, sliding it up to his long thick hair and pulling at it to angle Bucky’s face the way he wants to. Steve kisses deeply, running his tongue against Bucky’s bottom lip, begging him to open up to taste inside of his mouth. Bucky moans and easily complies, his own hands gripping at Steve’s hips and going up to his shoulders. Last time they kissed like that, Bucky asked to stop, so Steve tries his best to slow down, to lean back, but Bucky doesn’t let him, Bucky rolls his hips up against Steve’s and he grabs tighter on Steve’s back, his nails biting through the fabric of his shirt. Steve moans as he feels the pain of it and his hips stutters against Bucky’s. 

Steve slips a hand underneath Bucky’s shirt, stopping the kiss for a few seconds, just to read Bucky’s eyes, just to ask if it’s okay. Bucky nods and his own hands are now at Steve’s front, pulling at the hem of his shirt, silently asking for Steve to take it off. Steve kneels back and pulls it over his head, his breath catching in his throat as he sees Bucky doing the same. Bucky’s on his back beneath him, shirtless and warm and beautiful, his hard dick tenting the front of his sweatpants. It’s such a beautiful sight Steve feels a bit dizzy with it all. He loves the way Bucky is looking at him, with hunger and want. He loves the way those pretty silvery eyes are tracing the lines of his arms, chest and stomach. 

It’s even better when Bucky reaches, almost shyly, to trace those lines with his finger tips, when he sits up a little bit and kisses at Steve’s collarbone, sucking at the skin there while his hands are tickling at Steve’s abs and hips. It’s reverent, like he’s finally touching after dreaming about it for days. It brings a blush to Steve’s cheeks because nobody ever touched him so softly before, so carefully.

“Are you alright sweetheart?” 

Bucky smiles at that and looks up into Steve’s eyes, “I like it when you call me that.”

Steve reaches out to caress Bucky’s cheek at that, “Yeah?”

Bucky only nods, leaving a lingering kiss right at the center of Steve’s palm. Then he kisses Steve’s fingertips too, one after another. “I’m alright. I’m not used to it being so soft…”

There’s a hint of sadness in Bucky’s eyes as he speaks those words. Steve kisses him again, bringing his chin up and leaving soft littles pecks against Bucky’s mouth. He pushes at his shoulder, softly, until Bucky gets the hint and leans back against the pillows, his hair fanning like a dark brown halo around his smiling face. Steve kisses him again, then his cheeks, his jaw, down his neck. Steve kisses right to the center of his chest too, “I’m gonna make you feel good, okay?”

“You already do.”

Steve kisses all over Bucky’s chest, leaving marks in some places where he sucks a bit harder. With his fingers he teases at Bucky’s nipples, loving the way it makes him arches of the bed beautifully. When Steve reaches the hem of Bucky’s shorts, feeling the hardness underneath his chest, so hot and throbbing, Demanding. He looks up again, always asking for permission, always seeking Bucky’s approval. 

“Steve,” Bucky pleads, rolling his hips up as Steve busies himself into leaving hickeys over Bucky’s hip bone instead of touching him where he really wants to. Steve is a bit of a tease but none of his previous lovers ever complained about that.

“What? You don’t like it?” he asks, plastering on an innocent smile and he is looking up at Bucky. 

“Steve, touch me please,” Bucky sighs, already breathless, he grabs at Steve’s face and pulls him up for a kiss. “I want to, I really, really want to, Steve. Please I need you.”

“You got me baby, I’ll do whatever you want me to.” 

Steve pulls at the waistband of Bucky’s pants until they are slipping down his hips, until soft warm skin is revealed. Steve pulls until Bucky’s cock bobs free, hard and beautiful and the most wonderful shade of pink at the head. He kisses Bucky as he lets his fingers touch softly the velvety skin of his arousal. He traces the veins underneath it, then wraps his fist around it, pumping at it once and squeezing a bit tighter at the head. He wants to record the sound Bucky makes at that. It’s the most pleasing thing to ever make its way to his ears. He does it a few times, his lips still pressed against Bucky, drinking every moan and every breath his lover exhales. 

His own hips start rocking down against Bucky’s thigh, arousal taking control of him. Bucky’s hands are quick to reach down his pants, slipping through the back of him and he grabs handfuls of Steve’s ass. He smiles against Steve’s lips as he says “I’ve been dreaming about that ass for so long.” It makes Steve laugh in surprise, his hand stuttering from where it’s still around Bucky’s hard cock. “Oh have you now?” Steve asks playfully and Bucky only nods at that, eyes impossibly wide like he’s pleasantly surprised by Steve’s reaction. He takes a mental note to make Bucky laugh in bed as much as possible. Steve wants to show Bucky that it can be fun and soft and just as wonderful, “Tell me what you want, baby.”

“I-” Bucky starts, breaking off into a moan as Steve starts jerking him off again, lips at his neck and leaving biting kisses all over his skin. 

“We can do whatever you want,” Steve whispers, his mouth still at Bucky’s throat, “We can do just this, if that’s what you want, there’s no rush sweetheart.”

Steve feels him throb under his hand every time he uses a pet name and he loves it. 

“Can you… Can you still do that but with the both of us?” Bucky asks. Steve pulls himself up and looks down into his lover’s eyes. He nods once and it’s all it takes for Bucky to frantically pull at Steve’s pants and pull them down his ass until his cock springs free. It makes Steve laugh again and he has to lean down and capture Bucky’s pretty mouth with his own, he has to kiss him and feel him smile against his mouth. 

“Do you have some lube in there?” Steve asks, Bucky nods towards his bedside table, a pretty blush lighting up his face. Steve finds the bottle easily and pour some over his palm before grabbing the both of them again, pumping his hand up and down their shafts in slow, steady motions. Oh God, it’s been too long, Steve thinks as he feels the heat of Bucky’s hardness against his own. He moans too he can’t help himself and he feels it again, the way Bucky’s cock throbs at the sound of it. “Have you been jerking off thinking about “that ass” ?” Steve teases.

“Steeeeeeeeve” Bucky whines, the sound starting as a startled laugh but ending into a moan as Steve twists his wrist on the up stroke. 

Bucky’s hand reaches for his shoulder, going up his neck and he pulls Steve in a demanding kiss as Steve keeps pleasuring them both. Bucky’s hips rock up to meet Steve’s movement. He’s so responsive to Steve’s hands and mouth, Steve feels Bucky tremble and shiver in the best way underneath him. He loves this man so much, Steve feels dizzy with it. Bucky’s moans are getting louder and needier by the minute and Steve feels the way Bucky’s cock can’t stop leaking against his own.

“You like it uh?” Steve says, “You’re so wet baby.” It makes Bucky whine again, the sound incredibly beautiful to Steve’s ears. “Tell me, let me hear you.” Bucky closes his eyes tightly, like he’s not used to that, like he is not used to speaking his own needs. “It’s so good Steve, your hand feels so good.” Steve’s own hips rock down into his fist at that. His hand quickens around the both of them. Steve feels every single one of Bucky’s moans from the top of his spine to his toes. He wants to find all of Bucky’s secret spots, he wants to learn where to touch him to make him scream. It feels like it’s too soon and like it’s been forever when Bucky grabs at his biceps and his hips start stuttering into Steve’s fist, “Steve, please.” 

“Are you close?” Steve asks him, and Bucky nods. 

“Yeah. Yeah please don’t stop.”

It only takes a few more strokes for Bucky to spill all over his chest and over Steve’s fist. It runs down over both of their cocks and Steve keeps going until Bucky pushes his hand away, too sensitive to keep going. Steve keeps jerking himself off above Bucky’s spent body, his lover whispering encouraging words, telling him how good it felt, how good Steve is for him. It’s when Bucky tells Steve to come all over him that he finally falls over the edge and reaches his orgasm too. His own come mixes with Bucky’s all over his skin and Steve falls down on the bed right next to his lover. They stay there for a while, Steve on his side and Bucky on his back, both of them breathing hard and fast and smiling at each other. 

Bucky grabs at some tissues from his bedside table and cleans himself up as best as he can, throwing a few tissues to Steve too. Steve reaches out to put the tissues in the little bin on his side of the bed. He grabs Bucky around the middle and he pulls him closer, until their sweaty skin meets again. Bucky sighs happily, both hands resting softly against Steve’s chest, scratching at the few hairs there. “Thank you,” Bucky says before kissing tenderly at Steve’s collarbones. “Thank you, for being patient with me, and for loving me.”

Steve drops a kiss on top of Bucky’s head and closes his eyes, a huge smile on his face. It feels good to be like that, holding each other, sleepy and happy from a good orgasm. Bucky’s skin feels amazing against his own even if they are still a bit sticky with sweat and come. He is about to doze off when Bucky speaks again, “I’d like it, if we could share your room.”

“Yeah?” Steve asks in a dreamy voice like he’s almost floating between sleep and consciousness. 

“Yeah. And you know it, right? That I love you too.”

“Mmmh. I felt it. But hearing it is even better.”

They eventually get out of bed. And they go to the bathroom to shower together. This one ends up way better than their first one did. There’s no tears, no breakdowns. There’s no blood running down the drain as they clean each other up, no. Instead there’s Bucky on his knees this time, and he washes Steve’s but only after giving him the best blowjob of his life. Steve comes so hard he ends up knocking a few shampoo bottles on the ground. Natasha comes knocking at the door, asking if they are alright and even through the running water and the door, Steve can hear the way she is smirking. She knows they are more than alright.

Once they are cleaned up, they move Bucky’s stuff back into Steve’s room. Their room, now. Then they put Steve’s painting stuff back where it was at first. Bucky hangs up Steve’s art around the room and asks Steve about the different pieces. What inspired him, if he likes it. He even picks a few sketches Steve did of him and hangs them in there too. He says he loves the way he looks through Steve’s eyes. 

They cook a big barbecue in the evening with the rest of the pack and they eat their dinner on the front porch under the stars. Steve looks around the table at some point, at his family, his friends, his pack. He looks at his lover too, his mate. They are laughing, drinking beers with full stomachs and hearts filled with joy. And he decides that it’s a pretty decent happy ending.   
  


_“Sweet creature, wherever I go, you bring me home”_

\- Harry Styles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you loved reading this as much as I loved writing it.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find us on Twitter ! @Rosesnfeathers and @xlennelx


End file.
